With a pervasive sense of sadness, I drove to the courthouse, and filed my divorce papers.
We’ve tried to make our marriage work, we just couldn’t.
The clerk couldn’t say how long it would take to have a court date. So, we’ll see….
Endings are always bittersweet.
Bitter, because I feel like a failure. This is my third divorce. What kind of awful person am I, anyway?? (The only saving grace in my mind is, the first 2 divorces were to the same husband. No one can ever say we didn’t try!)
Sweet, because it will be a relief to just have it done, and over with. Even as amicable as we are, there is always a certain tension.
So, on to practical matters. For obvious reasons, DH will now be referred to as XH. (EX-Husband.)
We have agreed to remain friends, so he may still appear now and again.
My name will be changing again. Not to my last married name, but to my first married name. Since we have children together, with that name, and I was a Woideck longer than anything else, except my maiden name, Hawkins.
My last married name, Sanchez, never felt truly mine. Probably because he died of cancer after only 2 months. And being a widow was so shocking, and painful, that nothing felt right.
And now a new chapter begins……
so sorry. Even though you both agree, it is still a loss. HUGS!!
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Yes, it is! You understand. Others don’t, and it’s so disheartening to be told, “Oh! I’m so glad for you!” That feels like a stab to the heart.
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Oh, it must be a sad time for you right now Melinda. Sometimes marriages fail despite our best efforts ( I too have been married 3 times).
At least you can now start the new year with that behind you 🙂
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Thanks, Judy. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one. Yeah, things are not going well at all right now. Yes, a new year, a new chapter….
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Thinking of you and sending some hugs xxx
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As you know, I am not surprised, but I am sorry. I thought your spirit showed that you still had a headline using alliteration! I envy your strength.
Always your BBFF, Janice.
PS, If you need, I am just an Email away.
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Thanks my BBFFJ. haha!! Gotta keep alliterating, no matter what! Me-strong?? I don’t feel like it, but I am a survivor, for sure.
Thanks! Sometimes, it’s too hard to put it in type!
BBFFM
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Melinda, hugs to you- don’t know what to say- if its for the best then go for it.
What is the long sheet with names you have put on top of the post ?
Susie
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Thanks, Susie. I appreciate it. That was just a pic I found when searching for pix of “divorce”.
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Oh Melinda, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize. There’s suck a rug-out-from-under-you feeling with that; disorientation.
You have to do what’s right for you before you can do anything for anybody else. Remember that. You’ll get there… at first in little lavender baby steps, then in strong purple strides. Mega hugs, my friend.
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Thanks, Teagan. Yeah, how would y’all know when he kept appearing?? But a year or so ago, I had mentioned we separated.
Thank you so much for the support, and validation!! I can’t wait to be running full out!!
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*hugs* it is never easy to let go even if it is for the better.
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Thank you! that’s it exactly.
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Sorry dear!
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Thanks, Lynn. You know the pain of a marriage not working.
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yes not fun in all cases! 😦
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First, please accept my condolences. It isn’t easy nor happy.
I am not often here, sometimes i read your comments. I think we have exchsnged or liked some comments between our blogs. I feel like I learned something important today.
I feel I may help a little if I tell you I was considered the “girl next door” and mouths fell open at my last reunion when I said I had been married and divorced 3 x. I think it is better than staying with someone who you are unhappy with or someone who is controlling. There are many reasons why you and your ex didn’t work but you will miss him, in a part of your heart always. I honor this sad longing and allow my mind to wonder, then I do remember the “why?” Because there was a reason… or two. ♡♡ you will be ok.
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Thank you so much!! Yes, I haven’t been to see you for awhile, though.
That does help, a lot!! Definitely, there’s reasons, but we will always
be connected due to our 13 years together. Unlucky 13. 😦
Do I call you REO?
Melinda
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Divorce can’t ever be easy on anyone. You seem to very directed and a strong person. It’s all about moving onwards and upwards!
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People say I’m strong all the time. But what they usually mean is bossy!
Thank you, Carolann.
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Can’t we just call you Mel?
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Sure! lol But, I’m thinking they need more to go on my license!
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So sorry to hear it. You’ll be in my thoughts and prayers.
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Thank you so much, Jenny. I appreciate that.
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Thinking of you!!!! *HUGS* That is hard, but no, you’re not an awful person at all! Life happens, and we do the best we can. I think it is wise to know when something is healthier ended! Praying for good and joyful things for you going forward!
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Oh, SArah Eliza, thank you SO much for the support!
I appreciate your prayers more than you can know!
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My dear Purple lady, it is well with you. Jesus will never abandon you.
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Thank you so much, H.O.
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Yes, hugs! Xx
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🙂
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Melinda, I’m so sorry you’ve had to endure such trauma. Know that you’re in my prayers. I admire your strength and your attitude of friendship toward your soon to be ex.
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Melinda..take care! M sorry you are going through this..but keep striding..keep smiling..Love & Hugs..<3
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Thanks so much, Roopam. If you can do it, so can I. You encourage me.
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:)..i hope this message finds you in purple of health!
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Ah, thanks, Roopam! I’m wonderful! And you?
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I am alright Melinda..
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Ok, It doesn’t sound like it from your posts. Hugs, Melinda
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Oh..am just a girl with moods going up and down…I am good..thanks..:)
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Ok. Just wanted to check with you!
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Thanks Melinda.. ❤
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You’re welcome, Roopam.
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