Strangest Struggles

{Yeah, I know.   I’m supposed to be writing about the De-clutterathon.    I’ll get to it, I’ll get to it!   Don’t rush me!}

It’s so weird.  It seems no sooner do I post that I’m struggling to post every day, than my brain starts running away with new post ideas!

Hate the green pants and shoes, but hey!   The brain is purple, so I had to “run” with it!


What is going on??   Does my brain just hate me??   Does part of it just hide behind a figurative doorway, just waiting till the other part says “Uncle!”??   Then the first part jumps out and says “Boo!  Haha, fooled you!!   I really do have lots of post ideas up my sleeve!”

Is it the depression??   The bi-polar??  Being an eccentric writer??   Exhaustion??   Dementia setting in??   What??   I really need to know, because it’s driving me crazy!!   Oops, nope, wrong saying.   I’ve already reached that destination.   It’s keeping me up at night!!   There we go!!   That’s the one.

Here it is 2:12 am, and I can’t turn off my my squirrel wheel,

{Nope, not a squirrel, but the wheel is purple… so ya know what I’m gonna say…}

and go to sleep.   Noooo, I have to hurry up and capture all these whirling thoughts, before they drift away, like smoke from a campfire.   If I don’t, I’ll never think the exact same thoughts again, and I’ll fight those struggles for a while, being frustrated with myself, for not getting them down on paper, on the computer screen, when they were fresh.   I’ve already done that several times with posts.  I write a whole brilliant story in my head, but don’t get up and actually write it.  Then later, when I try to remember, it’s gone.  And I know it was perfect!!   And all I’m left with is the title, and a few stray fragments of sentences, that aren’t cohesive.

It’s the strangest thing.   I know our brains are marvelous things, created by God to do miraculous things.   But does mine really have to be so contrary??   Apparently, it must.   sigh

Anyone have any suggestions??  Besides hiring a secretary to sit by my bed, with her pad, pencil, catching my stray thoughts in shorthand??   {Trust me, if I had the money to burn, I’d probably do that!!   But, only if she wrote exclusively in purple ink.  Or conversely, on purple paper.   Or!   Even better!   Purple ink on purple paper!   But, that’s hard to read,

slob, humor, purple paper

Well, I guess not tooo hard…   Did ya catch the mistake??  Yeah, I forgot to proofread!

 unless you use white gel pens.  And I haven’t seen any at Publix lately.}

So, to add to my already full basket of troubles, foibles, and struggles, I have this strangest one.  Oh delight!!   At least I don’t keep anyone else up!!   Living alone does have it’s advantages!

24 thoughts on “Strangest Struggles

  1. You just described my struggle perfectly. Why only last night (this morning?) I was up until 4am musing. At 2am, my very patient husband turned over and asked when I was going to put the light out (because he gets up at 6am for work). When I just read your words ‘at least I don’t keep anyone else up’ I felt like you were getting at me :-0 I dragged my backside into the spare room and carried on writing. Now, I feel as if I drank a bottle of whisky last night (haven’t had a drink since Sept 21st 1990) and what I wrote is crap in the cold light of day. Another night wasted. Oh for the wings, for the wings of a dove. Probably is dementia in my case. Brilliant post. The last word is for you – purple. Oh wait, my suggestion? A voice recorder is good (if you live alone). I hold mine while I am on my ideas generator (aka the treadmill). Purple.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Gamblers say that cards love tears. Apparently, the more you cry that you are losing, the more you win at the end. I am not a gambler, but it sometimes works the same with creative ideas. Go ahead and cry that you don’t have any, and they will come!

    Liked by 1 person

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