Blithe Blog

Dear Dolly has nominated me for another award!!     Thanks, Dolly!!      I love that woman- cat?    Wom-cat?    Wo-at??   Ca-man??        I ❤ Dolly!!

Here’s her post, where she nominates me, and schools us on DaVinci. https://koolkosherkitchen.wordpress.com/2017/02/20/leonardo-was-a-blog-aholic-sweet-potato-and-spinach-bisque/  

 What a cool guy!! I would LOVE to be able to write with one hand, and draw with the other!  (I would love to be able to draw, period!!)

And her soup is wonderful, I know!        No, I haven’t made it yet, but she is a superb cook, so I just know.

This is a brand spanking new award, created by: Esmé of The Recipe Hunter (Cook & Enjoy).          {I had NO idea you could make up your own awards!!         Now, my mind is off and running in that direction!!      Yee haw!!}

slob, humor, Blog-aholic award

 

What is The Blog-aholic Award?

“The Blog-aholic Award” is an award for bloggers addicted to blogging with creative, ingenious and inspiring posts. They mesmerize their followers with their posts, keep them captivated and riveted to their blog. The Blog-aholic Award is also for bloggers who “Share and Inspire Others!” The Recipe Hunter (Cook & Enjoy) 

(Mesmerize, do I???      Captivate, and rivet y’all??       Does that mean I gotta start feeding the whole crowd of ya??        Crock pot Lentil soup coming up!!)

Rules

  1. Put the above award logo/image on your blog.     Yeppers
  2. List the rules .    Yeppers
  3. Thank the blogger who nominated you and provide a link to their blog (it can be to the post in which they nominated you or any other post or you can even link to their “About” page).        Yeppers 
  4. Mention the creator, Esme, of this award and please provide a link or pingback as I [Esmé of The Recipe Hunter (Cook & Enjoy) ] would love to meet you!       Yeppers
  5. Write a post to show your award.        Another one??      Or does this one count??     😉 
  6. Share a link to your best post(s).           Hmmm, they’re all the best!!        How do you choose which of your babies is the best?????       By choosing the ones containing the word “best” of course!

https://purpleslobinrecovery.wordpress.com/2017/02/03/seven-seconds-scullery-spices/

https://purpleslobinrecovery.wordpress.com/2017/01/10/play-doh-plague/

https://purpleslobinrecovery.wordpress.com/2016/12/22/frabulous-frames/

And 1 more, just for good measure.

https://purpleslobinrecovery.wordpress.com/2016/09/26/mixed-memes/

7. Share 3 interesting and different facts about yourself.                                                                   It feels like y’all already know everything about me!    

  • I used to bite my toenails, when I was much, much younger, and a TON more bendy!!
  • I’ve been caffeine free since 2006, when I was in the hospital, for a week with pneumonia.     They would only let me have Sprite or ginger ale.      At the time, I was heavily addicted to Coke.        (The DRINK!!!)          So, after the horrible headaches subsided, I decided might as well stay caffeine free.      And I have.
  • I threw myself a huge, hilarious 50th birthday party!      No one else would, so somebody had to do it!         (Maybe I need to blog about that??)

8Nominate 5-10 fellow bloggers, or more if you wish – with pleasure! 

  1. Accidental Missionary
  2. Brenda
  3. Kally
  4. Jena
  5. Jennifer
  6. Susie

That’s all for today.     The times when I can log onto Sweet Friend’s computer are limited, so I have to ration myself!

9. Comment on each blog and let them know you have nominated them and provide the link to the post you created.

Thank the nominator and mention the creator.

Thanks, Dolly!!       I think I’ve mentioned Esme sufficiently.       (4 back links seem adequate to me!)

slob, humor, Blog-aholic award

 

Double Dad Duty

Merry March Meme Monday!!     Hey Melinda!!       What??      It’s still February!     WHAT??   Are you kiddin?       Nope, look it up, I’m not lyin.     Well, this is kinda embarrassing then!    It’s okay, it’s okay, we can recover from this.      Are ya sure??

Merry Last Monday in February Meme Monday!         Doesn’t have the same ring to it, does it?   Nope!        Oh well, the upside is, I now have the title for next Monday’s Meme!       Way to look on the bright side!

Okay, last Monday, we had Dad pull duty, to make us laugh.      Today, Dad has DOUBLE the duty!        (Please, no doody jokes!)

So does that mean we get double the Dad??       Sure, why not!

slob, humor, dad meme  slob, humor, dad meme

slob, humor, dad meme     “I see no problem here.” Said NO mother ever!!            

slob, humor, dad meme

     Wait, did we just flash back to the 50’s?

slob, humor, dad meme

Go, Dad, go!

slob, humor, dad meme What??                    slob, humor, dad meme Right??!!slob, humor, dad meme

Poor girl is math challenged, like me!     AND vocabulary challenged!!     NOT like me!      Or just spelling challenged????       She is definitely challenged!

slob, humor, dad meme

slob, humor, dad meme

And winner of “Best Dad” in the Parenting Win category:

 

And here’s double the Asian Dad!!

Hope your belly laughs did double duty, as exercise today!!

 

Paper Purgathon Paper

Okay, so Paper Purgathon Prep, was not so very much paper purging, as it was de-cluttering.   So, today we are gonna hark back to that day, and do the real paper purging.

slob, humor, challenge

To refresh your memory, here’s the paper piles, that were removed from the microwave, and counter.

 

So, I put 15 minutes on the timer.       And dove in.

            I reckon these might be important.

(Boy howdy, I LOVE these circles!!!        Why did it take me so long to discover them??)

slob, humor, VERY important!    So THAT”S why they sent me the cancellation notice!     I couldn’t figure it out, since I “Knew” I had mailed my payment!        eye roll

slob, humor, ooohhh I'm mad now!

ARGH! I’m so mad about this!! I just wasted 5 FREE dollars!!

slob, humor, trash    Yay for easy trash decisions!

slob, humor, meds

Good only until March. I have 4 days to use them, or die

slob, humor, flash cards

Yeah, I was planning to label stuff, to help PP learn to read. Hey, she’s not 4 yet, plenty of time!

Granny and my girls,                          Emily the only dog I ever loved, with my girls, and 1 extra!      The one in the middle is Kimmy’s BFF.                                             Melinda as drum instructor!       LOL      I love looking at old family pix!

 Yoo hoo!      Melinda!         Yeah?         Back to work!    You’re supposed to be purging paper, not mooning over old pix!        Oh, yeah, sorry.

slob, humor, knowledge is power

Self explanatory

Self explanatory???        Not by a long shot!        Well, you know I want to get married again.        Yeah.   And??           Well, knowledge is power, and I don’t want to repeat the mistakes of all my last 4 marriages.      Oh, ok. Good thinking.     I guess.        I just wondered if there was something you needed to tell us?!        Nope!      Not yet!       If/when there is, you’ll be the first to know!       (Being as how you’re in my head, and all.)

Alrightey then. now that we’re back on track.       The book went to my room, along with the pix.      And the important papers, and the word labels.

The Beall’s bucks were filed in # 13.      (I’m still steamed about that.)

I threw away some more papers, and then I was so exhausted, I stopped the clock at 5 minutes left.      I know I’m supposed to do a full 15, but hey, are ya really gonna come after me for 5 lousy minutes??

Catch me if ya can!!    

slob, humor, gingerbread man

“Catch me if ya can!” said the Gingerbread Man.

Paper Purgathon- Prep

Today I’m gonna totally cheat, and count this for both the Purgathon series,

slob, humor, challenge

and the Seven Seconds Scullery series, because it’s paper purging, in the kitchen.                Is that cheating??            Multi-tasking?         Or just wise time management??

Here’s the hot spot for today.  

slob, humor, prep purge slob, humor, prep purge

15 minutes on the timer, GO!

slob, humor, bath bombs     Since these were right on top, I picked them up first.    Now, a dilemma.      My mentor, Dana, sez take stuff to where it belongs, right now!    But, I’m lazy, soooo I doan wanna do that!!       (But, she totally has a good reason for it.      It eliminates making a bigger mess.)         So, do I listen to her, and do it the right Dana way, or make a pile, and take all the like things together later?        To my surprise, I decided to listen for once, and took them to the bathroom right away.

slob, humor, bath bombs in bathroom      But wait a minute!!        Why did you have bath bombs on your microwave to begin with??          Well, because DD1 made them in a craft class, on her birthday, and she doesn’t have a bath tub.       That still doesn’t explain the “on the microwave” part.        Because it’s right by the door, duh!        She may or may not have inherited a dab bit of my lazy bones.

Next!

Extra pill box, that I gave to Mama, and boomeranged right back.         And in the donate box it went!       YAY- me!!

PP’s day care papers.       (Sometimes those people worry me.      Look at how close in size the “small” and “large” ovals are!!         Besides they’ve spelt her name 4 or 5 different (Wrong) ways now.      And completely re-named PPJr.       Happily, DD1 likes the new name, and is calling her that now, as a nickname!       Poor girl is gonna be so confused….)   Hung on the walls in her room.

I need to learn some new discipline techniques!       Dealing with a strong willed child isn’t easy!          But, it was easy to know right where the book went!

slob, humor, recycling       Confession- I did NOT take these straight to recycling.    I waited till I was going out the door.       I only go up or down my outside steps ONE time!     (at the time, at least.)

Grandmama gave PP the bracelet.        Considering it’s giraffes, I was shocked she let go of it!         Banished to a shelf in girls’ room.       The pink bone(?) thingy, file 13, don’t pass go.

slob, humor, mid process   Mid process.


slob, humor, papers, pix    Pile o’ papers moved to recliner, to sort later.     I know, I know, I disobeyed Dana’s rule.       (Have I ever mentioned I’m a rule rebel??)

                The “fine china” went in the cupboard.

Aha!      So THAT’s where that was hiding!!

slob, humor, free frostys tag!!

FREE Jr Frostys for a year! Yeah, baby!!

By this time, the 15 minutes were up.      Here’s the end results.      (Except I did take the Christmas stuff to its bin, when I went out the door finally.)

slob, humor, end results

And the reason the roach motels are still there:  I knew it would be an long, involved process, setting them up, and replacing all the full ones, with these new ones.       So, just better to leave it for another day.


I’m as happy as can be with the way that spot looks!!         Now, the REAL work begins, of keeping it clear like that!!!        (It’s such a handy spot to set stuff down, just inside the door!!) 

So that’s 15 more minutes added to the SS Scullery.     Total so far: 2 hours, 40 minutes.

 

“C” Saw

The “C” word again???      Melinda, I’m so proud of you!      You just might turn into a cook after all!!  Really?     You think so?       At my age?        Yup, I really think you’re on your way!        After all, haven’t you cooked once a week for 4 weeks now?          Yes, I have!        Proof that an old dog CAN learn new tricks!

But, of course, just to be safe, I had to self explanatory

“when can you call yourself a cook?”       (I wouldn’t want to get myself in trouble with the law, or anything!)         


 First result:  when can you call yourself a chef? – Page 2 – ChefTalk.com

http://www.cheftalk.com › … › Professional Food Service › Professional Chefs

 
Jan 23, 2005 – 30 posts – ‎26 authors

I know many “nonprofessionals” that can cook killer meals. But are … You can technically call yourself a Chef the minute you are the person …

 


Well, I’m not ABOUT to go so far as to call myself a chef!       Even calling myself a cook still sounds like a stretch to me!      So, on to more results.


Sixth result: (getting hotter!)    

The Difference Between a Cook and a Chef : The Reluctant Gourmet

http://www.reluctantgourmet.com › Education › Culinary Careers

 

Jun 15, 2011 – Do You Know The Difference Between a Professional Chef and a Cook? To most … A cook, on the other hand, can expect to: Prepare …. I couldn’t agree more, and the CUSTOMER doesn’t care what you call yourself

slob, humor, chefs

At the bottom of the page, as a related search: 

A cook is a person who prepares food for consumption. A cook is sometimes referred to as a chef, although in the professional kitchen, the terms are not interchangeable.
slob, humor, housewife as cook

YAY!!!!        So, I can officially call myself a cook now!!!       I have accomplished that goal!!      All done now, thanks.        I can die in peace.

slob, humor, me cooking!

Grungy Grabage

Uh, Melinda?

Yeah?

Grungy Grabage makes no sense.    {Also, it rhymes with cabbage, but I digress.}

OOPS!    Sorry!    That’s supposed to be grungy garbage, not grabage.

Well, that does make more sense then.

Y’all know I’m not too proud to show ya ALL my grungy grunk.     But, what am I to do when I keep forgetting to document it??

Recreate it??

Only when it’s something like a to-do list!     Not gonna purposefully make my garbage can really grungy again, just to photograph it!

Not to worry, it’ll get grungy again on its own!     Then you can take a pic!     How’s that??

ARGH!!          Okay, think, think!!     (sound of creaky wheels turning)      Alright, I know!     I’ll just wait and take a pic of the dirty water, in the can, and that will show how dirty it WAS!

Brilliant!      But, hey, what made you think of washing the trash can anyways?      That’s not something you usually do!

Ya got me there!     I went to throw something away, and it was across the room, so I grabbed it, pulled it closer, then, BLAM!       My olfactory nerves were so severely assaulted, that my neuro-pathways temporarily shut down.     I was paralyzed for a few seconds, but then the horrendous stench acted like smelling salts, and brought me back outta the daze.   I hurriedly tied up the offending bag, handed it to SF, dumped a gallon of soap in there, and sprayed it half full of hot water.     My quick thinking action is probably what saved my life. If I had sniffed that any longer, I’d probably been paralyzed for life!!     The amount of toxins per liter was eleventy bajillion!!

(Wonder where I can learn how to install a scratch-n-sniff sticker??)

So, here’s the dirty water pic ya wanted to see.

slob, humor, filthy

Isn’t it glorious??

Uh, not really.    Unless glorious now means gross, that is!     Besides, I didn’t want to see it!     You wanted to see it!

And now, ta-da!!          

slob, humor, still dirty

Nope, not clean, just dry.

Oh, oops!    Someone didn’t realize there was water in it, and threw in a coupla paper towels.       That took care of that!        Now, it’s all dry!          Thanks, XH!!       But, still dirty.         Guess there’s nothing else for it, but to scrub by hand, since the-soapy -water-left-to-itself method didn’t work.

So, I had to get out the 

slob, humor, lysol wipes   and actually scrub!     Because after all this time, (to my shame I started this post 3 months ago) the dirt had hardened back again.     Pictorial proof:

slob, humor, scrubbing      Now, Ta-da!!       For realz this time!!

The pretty, clean, and completely grungy-grabage-free can!       (All you cleanies hide your eyes, you will probably faint.)slob, humor, clean can

Well, okay, except for that 1 spot on the side.    And that little dirt at the bottom.  

slob, humor, cleanish trash can

But, I promise  it is a sterile spot, and sterile dirt!      I have the acid eaten hands to prove it!  Fine!      I’ll go back and wipe again.

Better now??      Ummm, how bow dah??      The spot is still there!slob, humor, cleaner can

And, it’s gonna stay there!!     I couldn’t scrape it off with my thumb nail, and it’s been thoroughly sterilized, so good enough for me!

I’m calling DONE!

Dad Duty

Yep, it’s the Dad’s turn to make us laugh!      It’s your duty- Dad!

slob, humor, Asian dad meme

                                                        Wow!  This dad is rough!!

slob, humor, Asian dad memeslob, humor, Asian dad memeslob, humor, Asian dad meme

slob, humor, Asian dad meme    Finally!    An explanation  for their excellent grades!

slob, humor, Asian dad meme

slob, humor, Asian dad memeslob, humor, Asian dad meme

slob, humor, Asian dad meme

slob, humor, Asian dad memeslob, humor, Asian dad meme

And I thought MY dad was tough for demanding a BA!!

Did ya laugh??     I did!     I felt it was my duty!

Blessed Blogger

Another Blogger Recognition Award!         I’m so blessed to have so many friends here in the blogosphere!               Thank you, Kuddos and Kiddos!!

slob, humor, award

(My first one was from Pearly, who has sadly stopped blogging.     😦        And my second one was from Brenda at Camellia’s Cottage.)

 

Here are the rules:

  • Thank the blogger who nominated you and provide a link to their blog.  

  • check  (How do I make a check mark??)
  • Write a post to show your award.

  • in progress

(Here is the pic again, just in case you forgot what it looked like, it’s been so long a whole paragraph ago.)

slob, humor, award

  • Give a brief story of how your blog started.

  • YAY!!      Y’all know how much I LOVE to blab about myself!!

slob, humor, happy!                Me, me, me , meeeee!!!!

  • Give two pieces of advice to new bloggers.

  • YAY!!       Y’all know how much I LOVE to tell people what to do!     (Others, of course!  Not myself!)
  • Select 15 other bloggers you want to give this award to.

Wail!!      

slob, humor, waaaahhhh!

  • This is always the hardest part, feeling like I’m leaving people out, cuz I can only pick 15!!
  • Comment on each blog and let them know you have nominated them and provide the link to the post you created.

  • YAY!       I love yakking to others, and telling good news!

Ok, brief story of blog beginning.     Ay yi yi!     Brief is soooo hard for me!     (Oops!  There I’ve already wasted 7 words, nope, 15…nope….   Just stop counting already and move on!!)

I am was a life long slob.      I decided in 2014 to clean up my act.      I gathered inspiration from Dana @ A Slob Comes Clean,   slob, humor, Nony     and others, and started out.      SLOWLY, very slowly.     My First Day was just sweeping, and mopping the living room, and it left me out of breath, and sweating.

I gathered momentum as I went along, and here I am 2 and 1/2 years later, all clean!      (And if you believe that, I have a bridge to sell ya!)        I’ll undoubtedly be blogging about this subject till I’m old, and gray.      You’re already old, and gray!      Does that mean you’re done now??          Uh, nope, I’ll be blogging about this until I forget how to type!

Advice: Hmmmmm…

#1. Have fun!

#2. Proofread each article at LEAST 3 times!!

slob, humor, purple paper

Well, I guess not tooo hard…

15 Bloggers:

  1. Susie
  2. ABR
  3. Cluster of Stars
  4. Claremary
  5. Teri
  6. David
  7. Jen
  8. Jena
  9. Grace
  10. Katie
  11. Robyn
  12. Gilly
  13. Linda
  14. Barb
  15. Anne

 

Can’t wait to read what y’all write!

Romantic Roach Resort

{This is sort of a sequel to Roach Resort.      (But not really.)     A related post??}

Floyd Roach invited his wife Flora to a romantic resort getaway.    They were both worn to a frazzle, parenting their herd of 20 kids.        After securing a sitter, they took off, foot loose, and fancy free.

After driving a while, Flora exclaimed, “Oh look, Floyd!  Isn’t that a new hotel?  I don’t remember seeing that one before.”

slob, humor, new motel

Glancing over quickly, Floyd agreed that yes, indeed, that one was new.

“Let’s stop, honey!  We’re never spontaneous anymore!” Flora complained.

“Ok”, Floyd grumbled.  “But it will mess up all my carefully made plans.   But, if it will make you happy, then fine.”

“How romantic!”  Flora gushed.   “I just love it when you’re flexible honey!”


After checking in, and asking for the bridal suite,

slob, humor, concierge

with more “romantic” gushing from Flora, they made it to their room.    She stopped dead still in the doorway, causing Floyd to bump into her back legs, with the suitcases.

“What’s the matter with you?” Floyd groused.

“OH, FLOYD!”  Flora {you guessed it} gushed again.  “Look how spacious this room is!   How bright, and filled with light!”  

“Yeah, yeah,” Floyd mumbled.    Peeking around her shoulder, he gushed {would you have thought he’d gush??}, “FLORA!    Would you just lookit the size of that TV??    It’s gotta be at least 100 cm, if it’s a cm!    The game is gonna look great!”   He threw this over his shoulder, as he took a flying leap into the middle of the couch.     Landing with a plop, he somehow had the remote already in hand.

slob, humor, roach couch, TV

Flora was astonished to see such a feat of athleticism from her normally un-athletic husband.

“Floyd?”  Flora questioned.       “Hmmmm?”  was Floyd’s only answer, as he was already absorbed in a show.

“FLOYD!!” Flora yelled.     “WHAT??”  Floyd yelled back, without even turning his head.         

“This is supposed to be a romantic get away, not a telethon!” Flora complained.

Fuming, Floyd stood up, and took one step.      His feet stuck to the floor.      What’s this? he thought.      “Flora!      Come here and help me!     I’m stuck to the floor!”  Floyd commanded.

Sighing heavily, Flora took 2 steps inside the doorway, and her feet stuck to the floor!

“Now lookit the fine mess you’ve gotten us into Floyd Roach!” Flora fussed.          “ME??     You were the one who just HAD to stop and try this new motel.     Only now we find out it’s a tourist trap!” Floyd fumed.slob, humor, glue trap

“Well, now what are we gonna do??” Flora replied.       “Un-stick our feet, lay down and go to sleep, and forget this whole thing,” Floyd decided.

Alas, that was not to be.       Floyd and Flora were both caught in a trap, far stronger than their will, or ability to escape.      They were frozen in their polar positions, unyielding till the end.

The slow painful end.     Dying of starvation, they nevertheless continued to fight, until their last breath.

 

 

Farewell, Floyd and Flora.      You’ll be missed.  

(By your herd of kids, and the babysitter, if no one else.)

slob, humor, roach coffin  slob, humor, roach coffin

 

Love Letter

Love Letter to my new  Purple Shower Curtain.

slob, humor, new shower curtain

How do I love thee?  Let me count the ways.

#1 I love you to the depth and breadth and height that the bathroom can reach.

#2 Thy long lovely lavender locks flowing from the ceiling to (almost) the floor delight mine eyes.

#3 They shade me from the harsh light, bathing me in soft wondrous lavender hues, delighting my soul.

slob, humor, soft lavender light

#4 Thy great beaded rings gliding along the bar like graceful beaked swans gliding along the pond, maketh mine ears to rejoice in the sound.

slob, humor, shower rings

#5 Thy plastic shields my floor from being flooded, and keepeth my feet dry.

slob, humor, curtain and rug

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#6 The sheer sight of you fills my heart with pure joy.

#7 I love you with the smiles, and tears of my whole life.

slob, humor, kisses

Oh how I love thee!!

#8 And if God choose, I shall but love thee better after your death.

 


Inspiration, and partial author’s credit to 

Elizabeth Barrett Browning, 18061861