Lucy’s Lingo

Well, I might as well make this an official “thing.”

I’m going to repost all my old posts, in order.       What a great way to avoid having to get those pix off my phone!!        lol!!        I’m all for taking the easy way out!

But no, it’s not for me!        It’s for you, my readers!!          Most of you have not been with me from the very beginning, so now you’ll know “the rest of the story.”        Thank you, Paul Harvey!

The 3rd day of my blogging adventure:

https://purpleslobinrecovery.wordpress.com/2014/08/20/lingo/

With bonus features!!        The alliterative titles, I mean!

The photos were added later.

slob, humor, proud mama

DD2’s a Dr!!

The photo of me and DD2, was from her graduation as a Dr!!

And the reason there are no photos of my babies: DD1 has a strict no online presence policy.     Which I used to fight her about, until I learned about all the dangers.

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Busted Back

Well, hey.   Once again, sorry this post is late today.          Never promise anything that you have no direct control over!       Last week, I think I said something about this week being back to normal, and posting 5x.       Heh heh.        “What is normal, but a setting on your dryer???”        (That is not original, I copied it from Barbara Johnson, a humorous Christian author.)

Anyway, so yesterday, I thought I’d have time to write today’s post, since I didn’t get them written last weekend.       Nope, stuff happened.       For one thing, this new phone is exasperating!!       I try to download/upload, whichever, new pix, and it says there are none.        I literally just took the pix 5 seconds ago!!       Arrrgghh!!  

Then, dun dun, dun...   my back went out last night.       So, I just tried to survive the night.           Sleep????        What’s that??       I no longer have any pain pills, because I dumped them out, a while back, when my back was out, and I noticed I was getting addicted,      “Take every 6-8 hours”.        But then, the pain returned in 5, so I’d take it then.        Then it was every 4, and 3 hours, and then every 2.       At that point, when my headaches would start right on the dot of 2 hours and 1 minute, I realized what was going on.      I was addicted!!           As a recovering alcoholic, that was terrifying to me.  So, I threw them all away, and suffered thru the horrible headaches, and prayed to God to help me.       And He did.

And I’ve not gotten another prescription of Vicodon, or anything else like it.             So, when my back goes out, like last night, all I have is Tylenol.        Which my pain laughs at.          

But, I WILL not ever knowingly let myself be addicted to another drug.

Sugar doesn’t count!!         (I heard all y’all say, “But your peach Fantas!”)

Anyways, here I am.       Since it hurts any which way, I decided to get up and write.

I have no pix today, please bear with me.

I have 9, count ’em, NINE drafts waiting for pix!!         sigh

As always, thanks for listening!!

I love ya!

(Do you feel like you’re reading my diary??)

Second Song

Here is my second ever post.

Second Day.

I had even learned how to upload my own pix!!       Wooo hoo!       I was on a roll!!

I didn’t know my BBFFJ, yet tho, so no alliteration!       😉

But the purple has been there from the beginning.

When I decided to start a blog, there was no question about the color scheme!

slob, humor, purple confetti

It’s raining purple!

Mish Mash Memes

I pray for all the victims of Harvey.      I hope you are too.

 


Today’s memes are a mish mash.      Enjoy!

slob, humor, mind meme

Yeah, just like that!

slob, humor, mom voice

That’s a good one!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

slob, humor, little toe meme

So true!

slob, humor, litigator

Bwahahahaha!

slob, humor, clean house meme

Pretty much….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

slob, humor, hot slide meme

Yeouch!! And yes we did!!

slob, humor, weight loss meme

slob, humor, Chuck Norris meme

Love me some Chuck!!

slob, humor, Grandpa meme

LOL!!        He just calls ’em like he sees ’em!

slob, humor, nurse meme

This one’s for you, Judy!!

Memes, mish mash, potato, pa-tah-toe.

See ya tomorrow!

 

Quilting Quagmire

I had to have a serious talk with Melinda this morning.         “Listen here, Melinda, this is beyond ridiculous!!      Curtis has been waiting more than 2 years now for Shirley’s quilt!   (Since June 2015, to be exact.)       You are grounded until future notice.      Get over there and sew!”

She wasn’t happy with me, but she knew I was right.    So, in a little bit, she texted me these.      

                                                                       Ya happy now?

No, as a matter of fact, I’m not.     I won’t be happy till you have it done, and in Curt’s hot little hands!        So, get off the phone, and chain yourself to that machine woman!!


So, she did.      We’ll see how long it takes her to finish.      It’s already 3/4th done, for Pete’s sake!     And she doesn’t even have to quilt it!      All she has to do is piece the top!       (Curtis wisely confiscated the batting, and backing, long ago, figuring it would take her the rest of the decade to do it ALL.   Good move, Bubba.     You know your procrastinating sister too well.


I try to relax, and read, as the seconds, minutes, and slow, slow hours tick by.

Suddenly…

“YAY!” Melinda shouted, startling me.

“Are you done?? ”  I asked, ever hopeful.

“Yes!”       “Really? ”  I queried suspiciously.

“Well, I’m done with the width….”        Back to the machine for you!!  

“But I’m hungry!   And I need to go potty!”  Melinda whined.

“Fine, take a break, but make it snappy!” I growled.


(More hours, and then days go by…..)


“I’m duh-hunnnnn!” Melinda singsonged.

Oh my goodness!       Can it be true??        I think I better sit down before I faint!!

“Here it is!” Melinda proudly exclaims.

I pore over every square, and every seam.          Well, that didn’t work out very well, did it?

slob, humor, quilt mistake

Oopsie!       Nobody’s gonna notice 1 teensy mistake, right??

“Yeah, about that…..  mistakes happen, when you’re tied to the machine.     Makes it hard to maneuver.”  Melinda tried to justify.       “The important thing is , it’s DUN DUN!!”


All of this was optimistically written last February, before I started de-cluttering so hard.

And today is Tuesday, July 31, 2017.

So, yeah, Melinda if you would just seriously GET IT DONE!!       That would be great!

I tried!!       Really I did!

Tasty Tuna Two  explains what happened…..

.


And here we are on Monday, 8/21.      Thankfully, still 2017!

And it really is done!!

Seriously??          YES!!          See??

slob, humor, Shirley's quilt top

Ain’t it so purdy??

Oh, you mean the top is pieced.         Well, yeah, I said it’s done!          The whole quilt isn’t done until you have all 3 layers, and they are quilted together.

Oh, well then.        The top is done!!         I will show off the results to Sis Shirley on Friday, and regain possession of the missing 2 layers.       That is if Curtis trusts me enough to return them!!        He might decide to keep the top, and teach himself to quilt!        

It would probably get done in the same amount of time!

Brand Brush

I wanted to say “brand new brush”, but, ya know.      But, then I thought, “But it is a brand brush- it’s Norwex!      Ta Da!!”       Yay for the alliterative title working perfectly!!

Here’s a pic of the old, tired, plain yucky toilet brush.

slob, humor, nasty toilet brush
Yucky old brush.

 

 

 

 

 

(Yeah, good question.       Why DO I have 2 plungers??      Well, one is mine, and one was here.        But probably safe in assuming there won’t be a 2 plunger emergency any time soon.       Please, God!!       So, maybe 1 could go??           Perhaps.      At least to the laundry room, fer sure!)

And, it’s new home.        (Probably 1 reason it was so nasty, was it didn’t have a home before; just rested on the floor.      EEEewwww!         So, half not his fault at all!!)

slob, humor, old toilet brush in trash

Yuck!! It’s right where it belongs!

(Yes, I know you can see the Norwex cardboard packaging, and the aluminum can.       The 8 house doesn’t have the easy recycling system that I had in the park!)

Now, presenting a new and improved toilet brush:  The Norwex brand!!

slob, humor, Norwex new toilet brush

I super love it!!     I know it’s cray-cray to love a toilet brush, but I do!

But you can probably just call him “Nord”.      (Norwex-wex  and brand-bran.)       Here’s Nord’s sleek, stylish new home, a brush condo!        (Without the exorbitent monthly fees!)

slob, humor, new toilet brush holder
I love the thumb, and finger rests!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And oh!    The little extra brush, on the side is FAB-OH!!   It gets up under the rim, at the same time you’re brushing out the bowl!!        I never would have thought I’d get so excited about a new toilet brush!          That’s the power of Norwex, folks!

And the bristles are hard thick rubber, not thin little nylon bristles, like ordinary brushes.        So, I’m sure Nord is gonna be around for a good long time!

I  might even start swishing and swiping more than once a day, just to get to hold him again!

Did I mention that I’m love with Nord??

slob, humor, new toilet brush in new home

Nord in his new neighborhood.

He’s settling in so nicely, beside his new neighbors.       They’ve become very close.

(Yeah, yeah, I know, get rid of one of the plungers.)

 


Norwex posts:          (This is my business link.       I make a commission on any sales.)

slob, humor, Norwex

Norwex is the best!

#1      #2      #3     #4

(Yay!!  Solved my icon problem, by using theirs.  Duh!)

Totally Toxic Tub Toypaloosa

Get a load of this load of lovelies!

These is the girl’s totally toxic tub toypaloosa.

(I had already removed the moldy ducks.)


I got these spanking new duckies last week,

slob, humor, ducks

I have ducks!    And they’re in a row!    Look Elizabeth!

and told PP she could only have them if she threw away the old moldy ones.      

slob, humor, mildewed duck

This is not even the worst one.     Eeek!

Which she happily did immediately!       She even grabbed the nasty Mama duck, and threw her in the trash too!       Wow!!               4 toys out, only 3 in!!            Score!!

But it’s so embarrassing WHY the poor little innocent ducks had to meet their fate.     They were toxic.         Probably to the nuclear reactor factor- toxic.        😦

But this time is gonna be different!!

slob, humor, clear nail polish
Hopefully this will shut the ducks up, no more squeaking!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I read somewhere a long while back, that to keep toys clean, ya need to plug up the water hole, with nail polish.        So, here we go to test that theory out!

slob, humor, nail polish on duck holes

I’ll try anything!

It worked on the mama duck’s beak, but not so well on the babies’ bottoms.       The nail polish just kept endlessly dripping into the empty cavern.       Need to go back to the drawing board!

Now, to get rid of the other toxic tub toys.

slob, humor, toxic tub toys being thrown away

Buh bye totally toxic tub toys!

Yeah, when PP, and PPJR get back from Daddy’s, they will probably notice a few toys missing.       But, hoping the joy of the new duckies will carry them along for a while!!

Well, I know they are really, really gonna miss this 1 especially.

slob, humor, dirty mermaid

Pretty dirty mermaid

So, I’m thinking I will try to rescue it with Norwex.        Will post about the rescue effort later.


slob, humor, safe tub toys

Perfectly purged playthings.

Totally toxic tub toypaloosa no more!!

 


An 8 house post.

#1            #2           #3           #4          #5           #6         #7         #8            #9         #10

#11      #12       #13        #14        #15         #16        #17          #18       #19       #20

#21      #22