Seven Seconds Sinking

slob, humor, 7 hours????

http://simplydesigning.porch.com/7-hours-to-a-decluttered-home/

Poor Ashley Phipps, doesn’t know me, or my home.       I’m thinking she would run away screaming, if she ever stepped foot in mine!

Seven Seconds

Second Seven Seconds

Second Seven Seconds Sequel      

Seven Seconds Scullery 

Seven Seconds Scullery Spices

Seven Seconds Scullery Scape

Seven Seconds Scullery Sunder

Seven Seconds Scullery

Seven Seconds Scullery Spices

Seven Seconds Scullery Scape

Seven Seconds Scullery Sunder

Seven Seconds Scullery Scrape

Seven Seconds Scullery Scaffolding

Seven Seconds Scullery Second Scraping

SS Scullery Scrapings, Scobblelotcher

Seven Seconds Sisters’ Scene

Seven Seconds Scullery Skippy

Seven Seconds Shed

Seven Seconds Shed Seconds

Now we’re here:  The bathroom.

Or, as I’ve called it,  The “Sinking“.

My heart is sinking, just thinking about going in there.      Yes, the new floor is wonderful!  

slob, humor, beautiful new floor!

But that ugly blue shower curtain just grates on my nerves!!    

slob, humor, ugly bath

I really gotta do something about that!       Who has time?   with all this de-cluttering??     

De-cluttering is more important than decorating, right??       Well, it is when you’re in the middle of a series on de-cluttering!

(Update: Yeah!  I finally did something about that blah blue curtain!!    And my shower time is so purplicious now!! )  

slob, humor, new shower curtain

Isn’t she so lovely?

  

And then there’s this horror:

(No, not the faulty faucet, the other horror.)

slob, humor, hideous avocado color

This picture does not do justice to the glaring hideousness of the (60’s? 70’s?) bright avocado green color.      Shudder!      It makes my hands still feel dirty, even after I wash them!     From the green reflection on my skin!

The Sinking!!

But wait!     We’re not here today to bemoan the hideous state of the bath decor!          We’re here to de-clutter!!

Alright, I’m going in.

First, I looked at the counter.

slob, humor, bath clutter

Not a great pic, but it shows what ya need to see.

These can probably go:

slob, humor, clutter- bath

junk

slob, humor, bath clutter

Yeah, I know there’s still soap in there, but it’s been here since Christmas.

And without any angst, too!!         Yay!

And the pot went back into the tub, where it belongs.    What???    You don’t keep your toy pots in the tub??

slob, humor, bath clutter gone

Clutter be gone! Dirt stayed at home.

There!  Much better already!!

Happy Heater can go.    NO!!!      Not out the door, goofball!!       Under the sink!!

slob, humor, put in its place

Happy Heater’s Hot Home

This needs to stay, tho.    

slob, humor, bathroom need

Necessity

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I so wish these 2 would go!    In the trash!!

So useless!        Do they even make those tiny Dixie cups anymore??       {Wow, this is turning into a photo essay.      Hope y’all enjoy!}


Ya know what??       While I’m here, I’m gonna clean some too!         Don’t get your hopes up!        Nothing too wild n crazy.       Just swipe a wipee around.

 

slob, humor, cleaning supplies

I included the trash can, just so you’d have the full experience! You’re welcome!

Might as well do the toilet.       I know, all the germaphobes thank me from the bottom of their hearts!       You’re welcome!        

But I had already put the wipes back on the shelf.      [facepalm]

slob, humor, cleaning supplies

Back in closet. So efficient, returning it to where it belongs!!

Except when it’s not, because I have to immediately get it back out again!

Leave it to me, to make more work for myself!            

 


Disaster!    

While I was wiping the seat, after the handle, or was that backwards???      Anyway, the wipee fell into the bowl!      Oh no!!        No pix, just grabbed it up real quick before it completely soaked up all the water!       Thankfully the trash can was right there!

Whew, a deep breath to recover from that trauma.

So, that was the end of the toilet cleaning.     I had already swish-and-swiped the bowl the day before.

I’m coming up on 600 words here, so gonna cut it off here.

More tomorrow!


House Time Before: 12 hrs 28 min.

Today’s Tub Time: 15 min.

Total House Time Now: 12 hrs 43 min.

 

Authorized Artwork

In my house, there is authorized artwork, and unauthorized artwork. With a 3 yo, and a 1 yr, I’m sure you can imagine. But since you know me, you know you don’t have to.  I will show and tell!

Authorized:                                                           

 

slob, humor, painting

“Pretty in Pink” by PP

 

Unauthorized:

slob, humor, unauthorized art

Bed sheet- No!

Authorized:

slob, humor, authorized art

Pretty, pretty pumpkin

Unauthorized:

 

slob, humor, misplaced art

Not on the table, PP!

Authorized:

slob, humor, authorized art

“Self Portrait” by PP Her Pink Phase

 

Unauthorized:

 

More bed sheet graffiti.           (Why does my camera make stuff different colors??      It’s all the same beigish/pale yella sheet!!)   smh

Authorized:

       “My big hand”                                               Unnamed

UnAuthorized Artwork:

         PP does love her markers!      Apparently the cabinets were just too plain                            for her sensibilities!

 

And so on, and so on.

So  far, the only unauthorized artwork that PPJr has participated in is: eating the crayons!        Sorry, no pix of that, due to the no pix rule.       But she did make some marks on a paper!     And I immediately sent it to Grandmama as a love letter!      (while forgetting to document it for y’all.      My apologies!)

Hopefully soon PP will be broken of the unauthorized artwork habit, and PPJr won’t pick it up!       I sure hope so!

Shared here:

 

Toilegami Town

 

My friend, Molly, from Shallow Reflections has taken up a new hobby!!      It sounds so enticing, I just might try it too!!

“Learning a new skill: We researched ‘hotel toilet paper-folding’ and realized there are many variations besides the simple ‘V’ shape. Did you know there is an art called ‘toilet paper origami’ AKA ‘toilegami?’ By reviewing photos and YouTube videos we were able to learn a new skill while simultaneously creating the illusion of a spotless hotel bathroom.”

slob, humor, V pleated fold

Ah, the classic, just tweaked a little.

 

How exciting is that?????

I’m gonna check into this!!

 

Go check out this post:

https://paper-crafts.knoji.com/how-to-amuse-your-guests-with-toilegami/

“‘Toilegami’ actually is the origami-style folding of toilet paper. Toilet paper origami is practiced in many hotels worldwide. You can also amuse and greet your guests with this amazing origami style. This post offers enough online resources to start making basic toilet origami folds. Learn some basic and interesting facts about toilegami and start folding toilet paper to have fun.”

One of the fun facts:

  • The Tickle Pink Inn, a motel in Carmel Highlands, California, folds the ends of its toilet paper into fan-like designs, mirroring the folds of its bathroom washcloths.

 

 

 

Not the Tickle Pink Inn, even tho it is pink:

slob, humor, toilegami

Isn’t that the most gorgeous tp rose you’re ever seen in your life??

 

Toilet paper folding or toilegami has attracted the attention of observers within the hotel industry and beyond it.”

This is really a real thing!!

Hey, I’m starting a toilegami class, only $19.99!!     Supplies included!        Be the first to sign up, and you will get to choose the design of your tp roll!!       Bonus:   you can start saving towards your goal of becoming a ten dollaraire!!

 

Thanks for the great inspiration, Molly!!    I owe ya one!!

 

Patrick’s Page

This was my St Patrick’s Day post from 2015.        Wearing O’ the Green.

So, this year I thought I’d research it a tiny bit more.         Here’s what I learned.

From the website: http://www.christianitytoday.com/history/2008/august/real-st-patrick.html

slob, humor, St Patrick

The “Real St. Patrick”

“Patrick isn’t really a Saint with a capital S, having never been officially canonized by Rome. And Patrick couldn’t have driven the snakes out of Ireland because there were never any snakes there to begin with.”

“Though he was not solely responsible for converting the island, Patrick was quite successful. He made missionary journeys all over Ireland, and it soon became known as one of Europe’s Christian centers. This, of course, was very important to fifth-century Christians, for whom Ireland was one of the “ends of the earth.”

 

But, he DID use the shamrock to explain the Trinity, right??

Well, according to this website, no.     It was all just legends.

http://catholichotdish.com/the-pastors-page/saint-patrick-the-shamrock-and-the-trinity/

“There are several popular legends about how St. Patrick used the shamrock to explain the mystery of the Trinity.”

Being as how I wasn’t there, I am not gonna argue the point.      I do think it’s a great illustration!

Alright, now on to my St Patrick’s Day stuff.           You already saw my mantel.

slob, humor, St Pat's Day shelf   From Seven Seconds Scullery Scape.

Now, here’s my porch door, outside.   

slob, humor, door shamrocks             slob, humor, door shamrocks  Porch door inside.

   

                                  Front door, outside.                       Front door, inside.                                              

And I also put one on Vanronica’s window, PP’s side.    And immediately she said “Wheah’s baby _____(PPJr)’s??”         Bless her heart, for being so sweet to her baby sister!!         (Now, I gotta go take one down off the mantel, and tape it to the baby’s side!!)                                   

  Here’s some funny stuff I saw at the store.

I want these tights!!     Of course, I’d have to wear them on my arms…..                                       And the white fuzzy things are leg warmers!!!     LOL

Ok, so that’s all the green I got going on today.

Faulty Faucet

That’s not supposed to look like that!!

                                                                                                                Or that:

slob, humor, faulty faucet

It’s definitely not supposed to do that!!      That is the closed position!!       Supposedly!

That looks really bad!!

This is what it’s supposed to look like!       (When it’s off!)

slob, humor faucet   (Without that broken piece in the background, of course!)

Now whattam I gonna do????        Well, I guess you’ll have to fix it!         But I don’t wanna fix it, I wanna replace it!        Well, do that then!            But I don’t wanna do that, until I can get the purple sink installed!         Well, do that then!         But, I can’t, until I get the new cabinet, that fits the sink!        Well, do that then!          But, I can’t until I have some more money!     Remember those pesky credit cards that I ran up last year???         Yeah.           Well, sadly for me, now the piper wants his pay!

Ok, so whatta ya gonna do now then??         I suppose skipping the hand washing after flushing is NOT an option??        That would be a big N O!!            I guess you’ll have to use the hot water then.        And PP will never trust me again, if I tell her use the hot water, and it burns her hands!!        I’ve been telling her for almost 2 years to NOT use the hot!!

So, is washing your hands in the tub an option??        No, not really.       It is W A Y too far to bend down, to wash my hands, every time I go potty!!       Besides, those knobs are ridged, and faulty too, so they leak.     So, when I get them almost closed, after bath time, I don’t wanna mess!      And the ridges hurt my tender, widdle hands.         Awwwww, poor baby!

Well, I don’t know what ta tell ya.     You’ve shot down every suggestion I have.        The only other thing I can say is, Hold it till ya get to SF’s!!

NOPE!!     Not happening either!       What did people do before running water??        You mean how did they wash after coming outta the outhouse??       Yeah, how?        How do I know!!

Ok, ok, back to the drawing board.

Aha!       Hand sanitizer!       It’s not a perfect solution, but I think we can make it work.

slob, humor, green purellThere ya go!         Oh good grief!       Why would you even mention green Purell?????       Do you not know me at ALL????

(grumble, grumble)      Fine!       Picky!             slob, humor, white purell Seriously??      In the whole wide world web, you couldn’t find ANY purple sanitizer??

(grumble, grumble, grumble)           If you don’t like this one, ya can go fetch it yourself!

 

slob, humor, purple sanitizer  What’s not to like??                Groan

Okay, folks, I think we have it figured out now.       Thanks for your patience!          Potty trips may be resumed now!

The faulty faucet is on it’s way out the door, tho!

 

Seven Seconds Scullery Scape

The series so far.                                             

Seven Seconds

Second Seven Seconds

Second Seven Seconds Sequel

Seven Seconds Scullery

Seven Seconds Scullery Spices

Not “escape” – “scape” as in tablescape.     Except this is a mantelscape.      Is there such a word?    Or are you making it up??     Well, there is now!

The mantel is in between the living room, and the dining room/ kitchen.      But I’m including it in the Scullery series, because I love the alliterative ring of Scullery Scape!!       Doesn’t that just roll off your tongue?

Before:

15 minutes on the clock:

First I emptied out the bucket.     I truly had NO idea what was in there!

slob, humor, beginnings of bucket treasure  Only the start of all the bucket treasures!

Shell, and stone heart to girls’s room.    Yella wire, (didn’t SF braid it so nice and neat?) went to the cord drawer.     The strawberry earrings to my room.      They now reside in my basket o’ goodies: nail salon, hair salon, pharmacy, and jewelry box.

slob, humor, basket o' plenty

slob, humor, make-up pouch    All new make-up!!     That I never wear!

I decided to only keep the eyeliner.   slob, humor, purple eye liner

Of course it was purple!     Why would you even ask that???       (Now, we’ll see if I can still apply it correctly!!)               The rest was donated to the New Life Center for Family Preservation, that our church sponsors.

Yay!!      An empty bucket!slob, humor, clutter be gone!

 

 

 

 

 

All the spare décor, and other holidays, went into the bottom of the china cabinet.

I had forgotten I even had this “stumble” cube.    

slob, humor, quote cube                         slob, humor, "decorated" microwave

Mama gave it to me.       She knows her clumsy daughter so well!!         Here’s hoping       now that the microwave is “decorated”,  it will stay un-cluttered.       We shall see!

3:47 left on the clock!       Wow!   I’m doing great!      I can’t believe it only took me 11 minutes!!    to do all that.       Including taking pix, and putting everything where it belongs!     Craziness!       The pink pen, I gave to Rose, since she’s a breast cancer survivor.

To finish out the whole 15, I decided I needed to coordinate my inside/outside décor, since I’d already flipped the page on my calendar.

(Funny thing, the other day I was with XH, and asked him to stop at the Dollar Tree, so I could get some St. Patrick’s Day wreaths.       He said I didn’t need them.      I was a little miffed.      But later, when I found these in my craft stash:

And I had only paid 50 cents!!!       I was so happy he said NO!!       Thank you XH for saving me some money!!)

Finally the Valentine’s wreath is down, and shamrocks are up!!

slob, humor, St Pat's Day shelf

slob, humor, Joy!slob, humor, Happy St Pat's decor

DING!!

Now that time’s up, so is my tale.

 

Scullery time so far:  2 hrs 40 min

Living Room:               2 hrs 11 min                                                                                                                    

Total house so far: =   4 hrs 51 min    (according to Ashley, I’m almost done!)

(Make sure y’all check her math!!)

Love Letter

Love Letter to my new  Purple Shower Curtain.

slob, humor, new shower curtain

How do I love thee?  Let me count the ways.

#1 I love you to the depth and breadth and height that the bathroom can reach.

#2 Thy long lovely lavender locks flowing from the ceiling to (almost) the floor delight mine eyes.

#3 They shade me from the harsh light, bathing me in soft wondrous lavender hues, delighting my soul.

slob, humor, soft lavender light

#4 Thy great beaded rings gliding along the bar like graceful beaked swans gliding along the pond, maketh mine ears to rejoice in the sound.

slob, humor, shower rings

#5 Thy plastic shields my floor from being flooded, and keepeth my feet dry.

slob, humor, curtain and rug

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#6 The sheer sight of you fills my heart with pure joy.

#7 I love you with the smiles, and tears of my whole life.

slob, humor, kisses

Oh how I love thee!!

#8 And if God choose, I shall but love thee better after your death.

 


Inspiration, and partial author’s credit to 

Elizabeth Barrett Browning, 18061861