Bad Brian’s Bwahahahas

Of course Brian’s full name is Bad Luck Brian, but you know why I had to leave out the “L” word.

Just like the Crazy Girlfriend, I love Bad Luck Brian!     His memes are full of bwhahahahas!   Even tho his life is one big tragedy, ya just can’t help but look, just like a wreck!

slob, humor, Bad Luck Brian meme  slob, humor, Bad Luck Brian meme slob, humor, Bad Luck Brian memeslob, humor, Bad Luck Brian memeslob, humor, Bad Luck Brian meme

slob, humor, Bad Luck Brian meme   Oh the agony!!  Probably his twin brother too!!    Ouch!

slob,humor, Bad Luck Brian meme  slob, Bad Luck Brian meme slob, humor, Bad Luck Brian memeslob, humor, Bad Luck Brian meme

End of poor Bad Luck Brian’s sad story of sorrow.

 

Christmas Crunched

(Written Jan. 6)

Finally Christmas arrived!!          Uh, Melinda??     I hate to tell you this, but Christmas has been come and gone for almost 2 weeks now!

Let me explain.

Our extended family always celebrates Christmas, on Christmas Eve.     But, this year due to so much sickness, we had to postpone till NYE.

Then, still too much sickness, so we had to postpone again!!       It was sad.      SAD, I tell you!!

slob, humor, sad

dreamstime.com

 

But, ever so hopeful, we have rescheduled for THIS Sat.!      And whoever is sick, has to just stay home, and the rest of us will carry on!!       I sure hope ALL can make it!!

Wed. I had to go to the bank, so I stopped by Mama’s.     She had grown weary of waiting, so she gave me all my gifts right then!!      I loved it!!       Thanks, Mommy!

(In case you’re wondering, that tiny dress is NOT for PPJr!      It’s for my bottle of dish soap! It’s not decent for it to be naked!     (Not to mention it’s blue, and is therefore hideous!)

                                                       There!!!    So much better!!

Oh no!    I just realized!     What am I gonna open Sat.?????           Well, I KNOW  Brother and Shirley have me a present!!      (She already told me what it is!)     And Sis already gave me hers, long ago.       (She’s almost as impatient as me!)

slob, humor, silver jewelry

Gorgeous!!

Thanks, Sis!!       So pretty!!

Well, guess I’ll just have to re-wrap some things for myself! lol

 

Nope!!   Sis had a bunch of little things for me!

And the wrapping paper was so gorgeous!      (no pix, of course….. sigh)      It was purple, (DUH!!)  with “Joy” written all over it!!

And this:

Is what Curtis, and Sis Shirley gave me!!!       I was blown away!!       So stunning!!        She is a professional artist!        I’m blessed to own an original Shirley Hawkins!!         Now, all I gotta do is get someone to put it up!!

(Oh Sweet Fr-iend!!     Oh, XH!!      Calling all my men!!)

Cookie Chaos Calmed

The cookie chaos lasted WAY too long!!         WE (and by we I mean they!) made the cookies on Sat. Dec. 13th.

And the table was still a mess on Dec. 22,

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but I was supposed to have it cleaned up by Christmas, so I could have people over.    Sadly, I found out on Christmas Eve, that only DD2, the girls, and Pop Pop were coming, so I knew I had more time to get it clean!    (NO ONE should ever tell me that people are NOT coming!! It just leads to no good!!)

Wanna know when I FINALLY got it all cleaned up?      Fri. Jan. 6!     And then ONLY because we were FINALLY having our family Christmas at Mama’s!       (hangs head in shame)      I knew if I didn’t get Mama’s rolling pins, cookie sheets and cutters back to her, her head was probably gonna explode!

So, I washed all the cookie cutters.

And the rolling pins.    And the cookies sheets, and cooling racks.

slob, humor, clean cookie sheets

And the table.    

Ok, Pop Pop washed the table for me.    ANYWAYS, the table was washed.     Does it really MATTER who did it????

Yeah for a finally clean, and clear table!!slob, humor, cleared table

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yes, I know the hearts, but they are glued on there, and I for one don’t have want to spend the time scraping them up!!

Second Seven Seconds

The second seven seconds is the family (living) room/dining room/entry.       Since my kitchen, living and dining rooms are all 1 big room, it might be hard to separate them properly like Ashley  Phipps does.     But, I’ll manage!   As long as I’m de-cluttering, and documenting it, I don’t think y’all are gonna quibble about which “room” I’m doing, right?? That’s what I thought.   Thank you!

 

So, I started in the living room on Jan. 11.      (I know I’m outta order, that’s just how I roll.) My Christmas tree still being up, helped me decide to start there.    

 

slob, humor, Chtristmas tree

Yeah, the tp in the foreground adds such a classy touch. XH brought in the storage tub, and I started emptying it out.       THEN, I even wiped it out!!Yoo hoo!!   There were all manner of empty boxes, and crumpled piles of tissue paper, some being actual tissues.      What??      I wasn’t about to run to the store for actual tissue paper, when I had tissues right there!      But maybe, just maybe, since I’m gonna have a neat, de-cluttered home now, I’ll do that from now on.          Not holding my breath.        That would probably be for the best.

I evaluated all the ornaments that I hadn’t used this year.     Most of them were glass, or ceramic.      Why didn’t I use them??     1 word-  1 toddler and 1 baby.     Okay, that was 5 words.      Whatever.

Anyway, I threw out all the scratched ones.     There went half!    

 I wrapped all the glass ones that weren’t sentimental, for donation.      Why??       Because PPJr is gonna turn into a toddler, and stay one for years!!

slob, humor, donation

The sentimental, glass and ceramic ones, like these that DD1 made as a child,

slob, humor, handmade ornaments

and this one that DD2 made,  

slob, humor, handmade ornaments

She made the present. I made the cross stitch 20 years ago with the others, but had finished this one!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I wrapped up carefully and stored in the Tupperware box I already had for that purpose.

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Then I trashed the left over paper, recycled the boxes, and stripped the tree.     

slob, humor, ornaments(Oh, Tannenbaum, oh Tannenbaum, how evergreen thy branches.      Anybody else hear that music??)

All that hard work took me 30 minutes.     Making decisions is HARD!!

The actual tree was left standing for a helper to take down.    No, not PP, even tho I’m sure she’d manage to take it apart somehow , if I let her!    

Now, I only have 30 more minutes to de-clutter the rest of the living room.       We’ll see!

Oh, wait!    I almost forgot the 10 minutes I spent taking down the cards, and all PP’s decorations!        (And trashing them, much to my own satisfaction!       I was very proud of myself for not keeping them!        I did mark down who the cards were from, first.         Yikes! I only have 20 minutes left now!

See??      I knew it would take me more than an hour!!

Another 15 minutes on the clock, to deal with all this mess.

It only took me that long to deal with it, AND sweep!! Woo hoo!         Boy, am I getting good at this, or what?!

Hey, before you break your arm patting yourself on the back, you seem to be forgetting something.  What??       Oh yeah, I still have this left to deal with.                 And this:

slob, humor, pile o' clothes                                             slob, humor, clutter

Well, we’re already 55 minutes in.        But, okay, okay, more time on the clock.

But I don’t feel like doing those right now.      (Looks around to spy something else.     Anything else!)       Aha!     The china cabinet!

slob, humor, all clean    Nope!   Nothing there!     (I looked!)    YAY!!

Hmmmmthe chest of drawers, even tho I know there’s nothing in there I can get rid of.     But as Dana always says, Don’t assume!       Look anyway!       So I did.       Lo and behold!       All this can go!!

slob, humor, donation stuff                       slob, humor, why????

For pity’s sake!!      Why did I have a bloody candle????         I think you were gonna paint it purple?     And you only paid 5 cents on clearance.        Yeah, that would explain it, but obviously that ain’t happening!

Clearly I had NO idea what-n-all was in there!      WE have eleventy hundred videos, so I’m quite sure PP will never even notice the lack of these.     And I have no candle holders for the tapers, so……

Now I have a nice, fat bag to donate.     And that was only 8 minutes.      The total is up to 1 hour, and 3 minutes.     And I still have those 2 piles to go.     sigh    Another day.      I already did my few dishes this morning, now it’s nap time!!

Several more seven seconds to come!

Katie’s Kindness

Kind Aunt Katie’s one of my favorite aunts!!       Only one of, tho, since I have several, on that side of the family.    ( Not naming the other side today, we ain’t got time for that!!)     Aunt Sherry, of the porch, Aunt Cathy,( Katie’s twin), Aunt Minnie, Aunt Diane, and Aunt “The One Who Shall Remain Nameless” that shaved my head, when I messed it up the last time.

Katie’s kindness, and sweetness, are trademarks of hers!

I always buy her a Christmas present, of some sort.      For a few years, it was a $10 Walmart card.       On the lean years, it was only a tube of Cherry Chap Stick.      

slob, humor, cheap gift

But it was the thought that counted, she always insisted!

This year she surprised me with a $25 Outback card!!!    Wow! Blew me away!   I love that woman!!

slob, humor,                             slob, humor, surprise!

I was so surprised, I was speechless!      (How often does THAT happen?????)

Now, I have to carefully plan my menu…

A GF Chocolate Thunder from Down Under for sure!!!

slob,humor, GF dessert

2 spoons?? I don’t think so!!!

 

And an $11 steak special!!            The big question,  “Will I have enough left over for a cherry Sprite???”

slob, humor, steak special      slob, humor, drink

                           Oh brother, there I go slobbering on the keyboard again!

 

Jenerous Jeanette

My neighbor, Jeanette, gave me this jorgeous (hard “J” lol)  lighthouse for Christmas.    (I know, I know, here it is way into 2017, I’m still bragging yakking about last Christmas!       Well, I’m not done with the topic yet!    Sorry, not sorry!)

slob, humor, lighthouse

As you can see, I’m proudly displaying it outside.     It’s light is solar, so it lights up at night!     So very neat!    slob, humor, solar light

She is so jenerous!     Last year she gave me these gorgeous pictures, that she colored.     She also painted the frames purple.     She’s a great friend!

slob, humor, friend painted      slob, humor, friend painted

What did I give her?     You may ask.      Last year, I gave her an ornament that said something about being a good neighbor.     (Sorry, I didn’t memorize it!)        When I went to visit, the other day, she had it prominently displayed on her tree.      

This year I’m planning to give her one of the cross stitch ornaments I made.

slob, humor, cross stitch ornament

As soon as I find it again!       When I finished it, I put it in the living room, to wrap.       Then PP came over, and poof!       It’s gone!

So, the treasure hunt begins!!      I sure hope it doesn’t take me as long to find it, as it did to finish making it!

Well, never did find it.  

(Update:  this post was written Dec. 7.    I found the ornament on the very bottom of the tree, in the back, next to the wall, where I couldn’t see it, when I was stripping the tree!  On Dec.11, the very night this was published.    That scamp, PP!!    She knew I’d never look back there!)

 So, since I knew where this one was, this is what she got!       She liked it, cuz her tree is predominantly red decorations.       Good job, Melinda!!         Thanks!

slob, humor, finished!

Now, my joy is all gone….

Just kiddin!!      I still have Jesus!!

 

Play-Doh Plague

Well, the worst has officially happened.      The Play-Doh plague has invaded my house.  

slob, humor, plague          And I know who the carrier was!!     “Gwandma Wose”!      How could you betray me so badly, my own (ex)stepmother???    

I thought you loved me!      Apparently you love PP more.

I had no idea PP and you were plotting behind my back.      Watching all those commercials, making notes of which things she liked best.

slob, humor, plague Drat you, Nick Jr!!!

Most of you won’t remember the “Green Goo, because it was 2 1/2 years ago.     (Except Stella, who commented on it a year later, Queen Anne, and Susie, who both liked it.   Thanks ladies!!)       I had a terrifying preview of what a plague Play-doh would truly be.

And it’s every bit as bad as I imagined it’d be.

 

Clumps of sticky Play-Doh on the floor.     Lumps of it stuck to the backside of PP’s pants.

(No visual there, I was too busy trying to get if off before she ground it in, and it melded with the material.     Too late…..)

Bumps of it all over the table….

slob, humor, Play-Doh plague

And exactly who’s gonna clean it all up??????

I’m not bending over this time!!    

 

PP did pick up the clumps off the floor.    Thank you Precious!

And I scraped as much of the lumps off her pants, as humanly possible.      But those pants will never be the same.    Good thing they were her designated play pants already!

The bumps on the table???      As you may have already guessed, they’re still there…..