No Name

Originally, (on my other blog) this was named December Decisions.           Since obviously it’s not December anymore, I’m struggling to come up with a new name.

Wonder if WP allows posts with no name?? 

Aha!!        I found the name!           Thanks, me!               Anytime.


Such Situations

Oldie but goodie from September 2014.       Are y’all that have been here a while tired of the reruns??        I promise, I’m trying hard as I can to get my new site ready!!

This was while we lived in our 4/2 biiiiiiig apartment!

Failed Filing

The 8 house series:

House’s Home                        to             


Plotted Plants

Well, after weeding for an hour- ish, okay, half an hour, I was tired!!      No more weeding for me!      The next day, after lunch, I thought (very briefly!) about doing more, but my back was still aching, so an inside, sitting down job it is!

Today’s dreaded chore eagerly awaited pleasure: the failed filing cabinet.

Hmmmmm, sure does feel like deja-vue, with this filing thing.       Do you feel it too, or is it just me??

At first glance:

slob, humor, filing fiasco

Drawer full o’ junk.

All pulled out, after already hand shredding a lot of old receipts, because I was looking for my Beall’s account number.      So, of course I had to pull out nearly every paper way back there, cuz it was almost on the bottom, at the very back.    While they were all out, I just ruthlessly began ripping into ’em.


And 1 tossed insurance formulary.       Such an important unnecessary book!!

slob, humor, 1 dead tree

I need this so much!   NOT!!








This is also not needed:

slob, humor, not needed paper

Rules from my last place. Haha, I don’t have to listen to you anymore!!

On the other hand, I need this one VERY much!!

slob, humor, tax papers

2 years ago taxes. Yep, need those!

Lookee here, I DO have a camera!!      This surprises me every time I see it!      I always forget!

slob, humor, camera

A camera!








Now, I gotta get down to the nitty- gritty, dig in, and get this failed filing system straightened out, for the 95th time.     sigh.        Is it too much to ask of myself to actually file stuff, instead of just shove it in the drawer??

Apparently so!

Here we go…..

Christmas cards to Mama, rip up old receipts, papers I no longer need, pile stuff I need to file over here, coloring pages for PP do NOT need to be in my filing cabinet!!    Removed!   Pix don’t belong here….

Man, I sure had a lotta junk crammed in there!     And that’s just the top drawer!    For right now, I’m pretending the bottom drawer doesn’t even exist!

It’s 6:43 pm, and I’m starving!!      Dinner time!!

Organizing- Organized

Another book review..  And I haven’t really read this one either.

DD1 had this in the van, so I picked it up thinking, “Hmm, I can always use more organizing tips.  I’ll check it out.”  

slob, humor, book

It’s purple! Of course I was drawn to it!!

Not that you ever use the ones you already know, or anything…

Well, {head toss- not as effective with such short hair} learning is always good for me, whether I put it into practice or not.

Yeah, okay.


(Another old post- probably at least a year old…     And no, I never finished reading the book.      Just thumbed thru it looking for any purple pages.          Disgraceful, I know, I know!!         Please don’t tell the teacher’s union, they’ll take away my teaching certificate!!             Oh wait, I let that expire in 2012….         In that case, tell away!!)

Seven Seconds Scullery Scape

The series so far.                                             

Seven Seconds

Second Seven Seconds

Second Seven Seconds Sequel

Seven Seconds Scullery

Seven Seconds Scullery Spices

Not “escape” – “scape” as in tablescape.     Except this is a mantelscape.      Is there such a word?    Or are you making it up??     Well, there is now!

The mantel is in between the living room, and the dining room/ kitchen.      But I’m including it in the Scullery series, because I love the alliterative ring of Scullery Scape!!       Doesn’t that just roll off your tongue?


15 minutes on the clock:

First I emptied out the bucket.     I truly had NO idea what was in there!

slob, humor, beginnings of bucket treasure  Only the start of all the bucket treasures!

Shell, and stone heart to girls’s room.    Yella wire, (didn’t SF braid it so nice and neat?) went to the cord drawer.     The strawberry earrings to my room.      They now reside in my basket o’ goodies: nail salon, hair salon, pharmacy, and jewelry box.

slob, humor, basket o' plenty

slob, humor, make-up pouch    All new make-up!!     That I never wear!

I decided to only keep the eyeliner.   slob, humor, purple eye liner

Of course it was purple!     Why would you even ask that???       (Now, we’ll see if I can still apply it correctly!!)               The rest was donated to the New Life Center for Family Preservation, that our church sponsors.

Yay!!      An empty bucket!slob, humor, clutter be gone!






All the spare décor, and other holidays, went into the bottom of the china cabinet.

I had forgotten I even had this “stumble” cube.    

slob, humor, quote cube                         slob, humor, "decorated" microwave

Mama gave it to me.       She knows her clumsy daughter so well!!         Here’s hoping       now that the microwave is “decorated”,  it will stay un-cluttered.       We shall see!

3:47 left on the clock!       Wow!   I’m doing great!      I can’t believe it only took me 11 minutes!!    to do all that.       Including taking pix, and putting everything where it belongs!     Craziness!       The pink pen, I gave to Rose, since she’s a breast cancer survivor.

To finish out the whole 15, I decided I needed to coordinate my inside/outside décor, since I’d already flipped the page on my calendar.

(Funny thing, the other day I was with XH, and asked him to stop at the Dollar Tree, so I could get some St. Patrick’s Day wreaths.       He said I didn’t need them.      I was a little miffed.      But later, when I found these in my craft stash:

And I had only paid 50 cents!!!       I was so happy he said NO!!       Thank you XH for saving me some money!!)

Finally the Valentine’s wreath is down, and shamrocks are up!!

slob, humor, St Pat's Day shelf

slob, humor, Joy!slob, humor, Happy St Pat's decor


Now that time’s up, so is my tale.


Scullery time so far:  2 hrs 40 min

Living Room:               2 hrs 11 min                                                                                                                    

Total house so far: =   4 hrs 51 min    (according to Ashley, I’m almost done!)

(Make sure y’all check her math!!)

Touted Towels

After reading Cami’s sweet post about folding towels, of course my mind goes on a tangent. You already know my mind doesn’t work like anyone else’s!     And I started writing.     

So, to start off my premise, I had to research the “Right” way to fold towels.   And of course, plenty of people are ready to school me!

Better Homes and Gardens:      Who’s got time for all that smoothing mess??  She looked like she was trying to iron it with her hands!!      Does it not absorb water, if there’s a wrinkle anywhere on it??     Besides, since I’m not a hotel, no one’s paying me to fold my towels!      Moving on.

slob, humor, folded towels

Sure it looks pretty, but does anyone even notice??

The River Club:

slob, humor, folding towels

Eeeeekk!!    Now ya gotta measure your shelf, every time ya fold the towels??      Too much Math!!        No thanks!

Then, of course I can’t leave out Marie Kondo, the new guru on all things folded.

My head hurts already.     I’ve seen a video of her folding stuff.     I just say NO.     (Remember when DD1 Kon-Maried my undie drawer??)       

slob, humor, folded underwear

Won’t ever happen again in my lifetime!!       Anyway, back to towels…

My towels just feel lucky to have a safe, dry place to call home!     They’re not at all fussy about precise placement.      They want to just lounge, and stretch out their legs fibers.

slob, humor, unfolded towels

Well, okay, so their fibers are not stretched out exactly, but they’re balled up in their own chosen position!

In fact, if I started folding them precisely, and lining them up, in straight rows, I think they’d call the the Towel Abuse Hotline, and report me!!      They would NOT enjoy such treatment, and would deem it torture!

No call to take a perfectly relaxed towel, and twist it into a pretzel, just for a human’s sense of pride, and pleasure.     Those towels sure like a lot like pretzels to me.      Whatever!    My point is they are relaxed, not regimented within an inch of their lives!       Towels are people too!       They have feelings!

Linen closets are for stuffing storing the towels, not for visual enjoyment!

Fizzled Filing

slob, humor, filing

Filing system??

This is my filing system, as in- none that you’d notice!

That’s the top drawer, of my 2 drawer filing cabinet, which sits to the right of my computer armoire.   Along with the bookshelf on the left of the computer, it comprises my “office”   Where I do all my important “business.”   Ya know, play solitaire! 😉

slob, humor, solitaire

The game of the only lonelies!


This is the bottom drawer:

slob, humor, card filing

Designated card drawer

Filing system, you say??   {arched eyebrows}

Okay, okay, I know it doesn’t resemble a filing system, in any way, except that it’s all piled in a filing cabinet.

That’s where the “fizzled” part comes in.   I try to file, I have a place to file, I even put the papers in the filing spot.   So why does it all go wrong???

WAAAHHHHH!!   I want my mommy to make it all better!!

Here is my designated spot for unpaid bills.

slob, humor, bills

Unpaid bills.

Hey, at least I know where they are!!   Right??   That counts for something, right???

And here’s my shred spot.

slob, humor, shred pile

Under my computer. The burial yard for papers to shred.

And my recycling repository, the pre-taken out recycling, that is.   Hey, I’m busy here!   I’ll take it out later!    

I won’t hold my breath!

slob, humor, recycling

Recycling staging center


The fact that I have places for everything, and everything is in its place, must mean I’m organized now, right??   I have a filing system, it just … kinda… fizzled in the final execution.    (Speaking of execution, just shoot me now!!    I try so hard!!)

Nope, no resolution here.  Just the facts, that I know what I’m supposed to do, and I do it.   Sorta, but it’s still so far fizzled, that I’m not sure it can ever be real filing!!

So, the moral of the story is:  Don’t think you have a system, when it still doesn’t work.

So what is it that I have??  

Besides a huge mess??

Yes, besides a huge mess.

Maybe you have the skeleton of a filing system??

Hmmm, well, I do have the proper tools: a filing cabinet, and even some filing folders!!

slob, humor, file folder

Ah, yes it is indeed!! Love having my own castle!

(Even though my castle is not as picture perfect as PP’s!!)

So, what do I do now??   How do I flesh out my fizzled filing skeleton?    {Anybody else feel that skeleton should be an alliterating word here???}

If anyone lives in Fl, and can come help, PLEASE do!!   If you don’t live in Fl, and can help, PLEASE do!!

I’ll give you a nice chocolate chip GF cookie!!   😉

[Okay, I lied.  They are nasty!  Not nice!!   But I won’t really make you eat it!!]

Interns Incidents

The interns, Jessica and Carly did so much!   The incidents of them helping me, were in no particular order:

Carly cleaned the air purifier filters.

slob, humor, cleaning

Great job, Carly!! Thanks!

And de-cluttered under the micro cabinet.

Jessica purged the shelves above the micro.

They swept and swiffered kitchen/ dining/living rooms.   They’re all really just one big room.   I like to name them separately, just to pretend I have a bigger house than I do!

Jessica folded clothes, then cleaned the couch cushions.   I didn’t even know that could be done!    Lol

slob, humor, cleaning

Pulling out the cushions to clean them. Yes, PP thinks the couch is the perfect storage for her art studio, apparently!


Both girls totally did our church proud!   Thank you Pastors Keith Conley, and Rob Morrow, from Harvest Assembly of God, for sending them over to help me!


Harvest Assembly in Lakeland, Fl.     Come visit us!

Interred Interns

No way!   Melinda!   I’m shocked!!

WHAT??   What is it??   What’s wrong??

You buried some interns??

Yep, plumb up to their necks, in fact!

Girl!!   I knew you were a killer, but!!   People now???   Not just animals???    The cat, the elephant, and the cow were all bad enough!!    When did you get the urge to kill people??

Wait, WHAT?????    Kill WHAT people???   I didn’t kill any people!

But, but, but, you just said you buried the interns up to their necks!!

In SLOBBERY!!!!   Not DIRT, well, not dirt in the ground so they’ll die, dirt!

slob, humor, dirt

They were buried, alrightey!  Just not 6 ft under!

Not the 6-feet-under kind of buried in dirt!

teeny, tiny voice    Oh.   Okay.   Well, good, then.

Don’t you have something else to say??

Um, yeah.   I’m so glad you didn’t kill them!!

exasperated   Anything ELSE??

Oh yeah, um, I’m sorry I thought you killed them.

Thank you.

Okay, now that we got THAT straight, maybe I proceed, please?

still in a teeny, tiny voice      Yes, please do.

Well, my church sent one of their interns, Jessica, to help me clean my house.    Since my leg has been acting up, and with the kwilt crunch,  housework just hasn’t been a priority.  


Okay, well, even less of a priority than ever!

So, Jessica came the first week, and did a bang-up job on the bathroom!   It hasn’t sparkled like that, since I paid Nicole to clean it back in Dec!!   And swept the hall.

The only before I took.

slob, humor, dirty floor

Right at beginning of hall, in front of fridge. And I promise, this one isn’t a mouse!


slob, humor, clean floor

Beautiful bare floor!! Cute toes, and nightgown hem, Melinda. Really, must your toes photobomb EVERY pix??


But, she works 2 paying jobs, plus interning at the church, so she has really limited time, as you can imagine.   So, this week, she brought Carly with her.

They cleaned and organized the kitchen.   Emptied 2 cabinets, and donated stuff!   YAY!    More clutter outta here!!

slob, humor, intern, decluttering

Jessica decluttering glasses, which were bequeathed to me with this trailer.

That Jessica is a no-nonsense get it done whirlwind!!   I love her!!!   I want to adopt her!!

Carly even unpacked my newest Joy.   {Thanks, Sis!!}

slob, humor, intern, Joy

Carly’s apparently a little camera shy.

slob, humor, mantel , Joy

Finally, Joy on my mantel! (The erstwhile holiday shelf.)


They did so much more!   I could go on and on all day.   But, I won’t.   cheers from the crowd   At least not today.   equally loud groans


But rest assured, I’ll be back, with the rest of the story.

Party Time!!






Timed Tidy Two

Okay, so I started with Timed Tidy.     And I told you the rest of the story would come later.    So, here it is: part two.

I started at 12:59 pm, Saturday afternoon.   I washed a drainer full of dishes.

clean dishes drainer humor



(Well, okay, not exactly a drainer full of dishes……)



 Cleaned out some containers for recycling.   Took a potty break (hey, I’ve had 2 kids, if you’re a mother, ya know what I’m talking about, amiright??)    De-cluttered the counter top, by dumping out some nasty drink, from the Valentine’s party.  

moldy drink humor

EEWW!! Care for a beverage, anyone?? No?



 Put away stuff where it belongs.    Yes, some stuff DOES actually have homes!   Shock, shock!


It only took me 23 minutes, including taking the pix.    Now, really, 23 minutes is not long.    So why does it take you so long to do it, huh, PurpleSlob????

Oh yeah! And I cleaned the stove too!     Okay, Okay, I wiped the stove TOP.    Confession is good for the soul.

But, you guessed it, I’m still not done!    So, look for Third Timed Tidy any day now.    Just please, don’t hold your breath!!