Agoraphobia Agony

Now, I’m not agoraphobic.   Thank God!   It’s nice to know there’s at least ONE disease I don’t have!   I have 99 problems, but that ain’t one of ’em.

But, I can and do sympathize, and empathize with how hard it must be for someone who suffers from that.   Or another serious medical condition.

Even with as simple as my medical needs are, sometimes it’s.just.too.hard.to.leave.the.house.

Since I was diagnosed with chronic kidney disease, I always have my water bottle at my finger tips.   The other day, I forgot it, and I almost had a full blown panic attack!    Water is essential to maintaining my health.    (And yours too!)

my hand holding purple water bottle

There’s those giant man hands again!

(Note the purple initial Tervis, thanks Sweet Friend!!)

 

But, then of course that leads to the inevitable consequence, the constant need for potty breaks.   And that leads to the need for a tall potty, so I don’t hurt my knees.  

handicapped potty chair

Ooohh, love the handles!!

 

And a handicapped stall, so my fat butt doesn’t get stuck.   Seriously, it’s a concern.    One time, the stall door was literally so small, I could not go in.    Nightmare, anyone???  (BTW, I never went back to that restaurant.)   AND, my PTTPLSD  (Post-Traumatic-Toilet-Paper-Lessness-Stress Disorder)- What if they’re OUT????   {shudder}    Oh, the horror!!

So, some days, it’s just not worth all that hassle.

Not to mention, having to TAKE a SHOWER, and, FIND clean clothes!   OY VEY!   (Both of which require intensive amounts of positive self-talk to work up the umph to actually do.)

Found the perfect meme for this!

fat cat on bed trying to gather energy

Me- every day

 

So, if you’re ever in the neighborhood, and wonder why no one sees me for days at a time, I’ll be chained to the water fountain by my hands, and the other end will be chained to you-know-where.

Adapt-a-Bath

Since I’ve been in physical recovery, I’ve had to adapt several things around my home.  The bathroom is one of them.

I’m apparently incapable of standing up for a shower, exhibit A, the falls in Oct, and before that.

So, now I’m tied down to a tub bench.

20150408_120143 Haha, not actually tied down, but you know what I mean!  Actually, it’s kinda nice to sit, and not have to worry about whether or not I’m going to end up on the floor!

And, I must use a shower hose, or whatjamacallit.

20150408_120155Oh wow, I did NOT notice how dirty my tub was, due to my slob-o-vision and all, until I saw the pic. EWWWWW

But the question is, now that I’ve seen it, what will I do about it?? Ummmm, you can probably guess.

And 1 last thing, the best of all: the raised potty chair! With handles!!

20150408_120222Let me tell you, if you don’t have one of these puppies, run and get one right now!!  If you are tall, the raised height is so comfortable!!  And the handles! Oh, the handles!!  Perfect for creaky knees, (to help my arms lever me up silly! I DO NOT put my knees on the handles!)

So, that’s what a doddery old person’s bathroom looks like.  Not that I’m old, exactly, just the doddery part.  Unless you’re under 20, then yes, to you, I’m old.

May you never get old yourself!