Delightful Dirt Digging

Last Friday night, when the girls came home, I decided it was time to introduce them to dirt.         Well, actually, introduce PPJr to dirt.        PP and dirt have a long standing serious relationship already going on.       Next to rocks, her 2nd favorite toy is dirt!   Sticks come in a very close third.

slob, humor, hierarchy of toys

PP’s Hierarchy of Natural Toys

(apologies to Maslow)

 

So, out to the dungeon flower bed we went.

PP jumped right into helping,

slob, humor, Omie & PP weeding

                              Omie showing PP how to weed.  “No sweetie, pull from the bottom!                            That’s called, picking flowers!”

and showing me all the rocks, and snails, and baby eggs she found.      I’m not sure what the “Baby eggs” were, but she enjoyed finding them!     ( Tiny white spheres, that were very brittle.)        And I promptly “Ooohh”ed and “Ahhhh”ed over each, to her satisfaction.

I tried putting Jr down in the dirt, NOPE!      She wasn’t having ANY of that!!          Every time I picked her up, then tried to put her down, she bent her legs 90 degrees, so I literally couldn’t stand her up!  

After 4 or 5 times, I thought,  “Ya know what??      She wants to sit??         Sit she shall!!”   And I plunked her butt right down in the dirt.      (She had dirt already on her knees from falling, as she tried to walk.        Maybe that was why she was so adamant about not being in the dirt!)

slob, humor, PPJr toes in dirt

No!!!           I can’t touch dirt!!

She was not happy!!    She immediately raised both feet, like they were scalded!!       And refused to put down her hands.       I just ignored her, and kept weeding.      Finally I guess she was convinced that I wasn’t trying to poison her!

slob, humor, sisters in dirt

PP shows little sister that dirt don’t hurt!

So, she put her feet, and hands down, and started touching the dirt.  

Next thing I know, she’s covered with dirt, and eating it!!       

Play date over!!

slob, humor, Omie and my 2 girls

We got a lot done, though!!            Yay, us!

Inside for a good old fashioned hosing off!!         Except, back in the day, I woulda stripped her, and hosed her off right there in the yard!!        Nowadays, we have to be civilized, and use the tub!       {Not to mention, Omie don’t want to get arrested for causing public nudity, and contributing to the delinquency of a minor!}

 

This is an 8 house post.         Due to Shirley’s aversion to the long list, I will skip it today.  You’re welcome, Sis.

Plotted Plants

The 8 House series:

(Which my Sis, Shirley, asked me not to post every time.    How’s this, girl?     Any better?)

House’s Home

to

Plant Play

Today’s Plan: Plotted Plants

After last time in the garden, I was left with a farmer’s French tip mani.

Actually, a negative French tip:  black where it’s supposed to be white!

But, I had hardly touched the flower beds, so I had to go back out, and brave the heat, once again.

So, Thurs morning, after I dropped DD1 off at work, I came home, and it was only 8 am. The sun was barely touching the side of the house, and the ground was still wet with dew.      I thought, “Eh, I might as well weed some.      Then, I’ll reward myself with a long nap!!”        You know how I looooove my naps!

First I had to just stop a second, and admire my work!!         Then face today’s task.

Do you how hard it is to bend over, and pull weeds??           When you’re 5’10”??         And have a big, fat tummy, from regaining ALL the weight you had previously lost???    

Just in case you have no idea, from personal experience, it’s very!!        Hard, that is.

I managed to get this much done, before I almost dropped.     I only weeded close to the lamp post, so I could lean on it.    I gotta get a gardening stool, or somethin!!  

slob, humor, half way weeded

Yay!! Good thing I have long arms!!

Yes, you can see the tip of PP’s shoe, because I took this after pic, much later!        And I believe that pale blur is PPJr’s leg.

By the time I get the whole flower bed weeded, it’ll be next year!!

I know that’s not very positive, but I know myself!!

Besides, I do have a very good excuse for not being out in the sun.         Really!        I do! The severest side effect of one of my meds is- the reaction of my skin to the sun.      It causes damage, not to mention how hideous it looks!

So, sorry, I can’t come outside and help you mow/set up your yard sale/ teach you to ride a bike/ play lawn darts.       My pharmacist said No!

However, if I park close enough to the house, I can usually make it to Vanronica, without bursting into flames!! 

 

Cleaning Clone

Our living room window unit was faltering.        The orange warning “check filter” light came on.     So I asked Sweet Friend to fix it for me us, which he did very cheerfully.

But then I noticed that the outside of the vents were still very dirty.       So, I grabbed a wipee, and started wiping.        

Then I hear “I wanna help!”          Well, never turn down a child who wants to help clean!!

So, I handed PP another wipee, showed her what to do, and sat back, watching her go at it!!

I sent a pic of PP cleaning the a/c vents to the family, which showed her face, with the comment that I was teaching her to clean.

Sis in love, Shirley, said “I’m still struggling to get past the “teaching to clean” comment. I don’t know whether to laugh, or write something slightly sarcastic.       Well, I guess I did both.”     😉

Hey, Sis, I’m in Slob Recovery here!!      The best way to make sure you’ve really learned something is to teach others!!         Bonus:  I didn’t have to work anymore!!       Win-win!

Now that unit works like a dream again.

Great job, PP my love!!

slob, humor, little love

My purple little love!!

De-Clutter, De-claim, De-cline, De-clusion

Alrightey then.

In De-clutter, De-claim, De-cline, I pretended to work in the sink room.  In D,D,D,De-clusion, I really AM gonna work in there!  Promise!!

The other 8 house posts:

House’s Home !

Wandering Wonderings

De-clutter, De-claim, De-cline

Now we’re in the conclusion of D,D,D- the De-clusion.   (At least I assume it’s the conclusion!     But you know what happens when ya assume!!!)

Alrightey, let’s refresh your memory of the sink room counter:

I know, I know!     The hamper is NOT on the counter!       But, it’s significant, so must be included!

First, I found this hamper, as we were unpacking:

slob, humor, purple plastic hamper.

Purple hamper!! Plastic purple hamper.

And I filled it with toys, and toiletries that needed to come to the bath sink room.      You know me, gotta save those steps!       I realized, it would be so much more practical, in the flood sink room, when it rains.       So, that was first on the agenda.

There, much better, drier.       Also, the plastic will not attract bugs, in the same way the woven grass would!

And we already had a pre-existing palmetto bug problem, no need to add fodder to the fire!

slob, humor, dead Palmetto bug

Palmetto bug, in its final death throes. I chose not to video it. You’re welcome!

These bugs are huge!!    (Those are 1 inch tiles.    JK!!     But they are huge!!   The bugs, not the tiles.)

As I was moving the woven basket, to replace it, all kinds of roaches scurried out and away.   Yuck!!       Thankfully, DD1 had just walked in, so she was able to help me with La Cucaracha dance!

Good move (ha!) on replacing that hamper, Melinda!!            Thanks!!       Sometimes I DO use my brain well!!

slob, humor, woven basket roach motel- gone!

Woven roach motel gone!

So, 1 major space taker, in the donate pile right off the bat!      Yeah!!

Gorgeous purple, woven hamper, I love ya!      But I gotta let ya go.      I love my new, clean, roach-less room better!         Adios!

Toys, and more toys.      Since they haven’t noticed them missing till now, I think I’ll be safe in donating them.       Yay!!        Gonna fill up that rejected hamper!!

slob, humor, toothbrush choices

Do the girls really need a wardrobe of toothbrush choices?? Apparently, yes.

Sometimes their teeth might not feel like being brushed with a red brush.       They’re sensitive, and need to be pampered!         Teeth have feelings too!!

slob, humor, 3 band-aids in the box

Oh yes, the classic, “3 band-aids left in the box.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

slob, humor, rash decisions

We like to be prepared for any rash emergency. Or are we just too lazy to finish squeezing out all the remainder??

Since “remainder” is a math term, I’ll let you decide!

slob, humor, not bathroom supplies

2 of these things don’t belong…

Since they don’t belong in the sink room, they got banished to the laundry dungeon!

slob, humor, no knives in bath

A butter knife?? To cut the medication dose in half, or what??

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In the donation box basket, with you!!

Yada, yada, yada, more junk.

Look, Ma- drawers!!    

slob, humor, hair care drawer

Who needs combs, and brushes in this house??? Oh yeah, the girls…. Don’t worry, I do NOT use that nasty wire brush on them!!

All done!                 

slob, humor, done! (Almost.)

Ahem!! Not by a long shot, are you done!

Okay, since it’s only 1 box, it’s only a short shot, then.

AND!!      You haven’t cleaned yet, either!

slob, humor, dirty sink

Dirty sink. In the sink room. Imagine that.

You’ve read all the same slob blogs I have.       De-cluttering comes first!!        So cleaning comes easier!!

slob, humor, box in cabinet

There ya go! All nice and tucked away!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now, I’m done done!

So nice and clean!!         Ahem!!         Oh uh, I mean de-cluttered!!        I can’t do it ALL in one day!!        That’s just crazy talk!

The rocks are from PP’s carefully curated collection.      Yes, we meant to leave them there.

slob, humor, rock decor

Don’t these just say “calm, and serenity now” to you??

(Have I mentioned how much I HATE this black , faux leather, contact paper, that is on every flat surface in this house??       ARGH!!)

Oh yes, yes, “Calm, and serenity now.”

Take a well deserved break, Melinda!       The sink room counter is lovely!       And the black highlights the rough, natural texture of the rocks.

 

ARGH!!!!!

 

Chewed Cheeks

When you first bite the lining of your cheek, then it expands to triple its square footage, inch-age??

slob, chewed cheek

See how the cheek takes over??   Not PP’s mouth.

Alternately, teeth grow to be 5 times their size.

These were so cute, I couldn’t decide between them, so had to use both!

Try blowing your cheeks out, while talking or eating.  It’s very very difficult!

Or, sticking your finger in, to hold the cheek away from the terrible teeth, to eat , is difficult not to mention messy and rude.

slob, painful cheeks

Holding the cheek away from the pain,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cheeks chewed into chunks, this ever happen to you?          No?               Only me then. <sigh>

 

And right now it’s happening to poor PP.     Darling girl can’t even eat anything cuz the inside of her cheek fills her whole mouth!   At least I’m assuming, from the horrible screams whenever she gets brave enough to actually try taking a bite of anything.

 😦

No wonder she refuses to eat……

Poorly Pudding Pop

Today marks a full 7 days that PP has been sick.    😦

Poor PP, feeling poorly Pudding Pop. 

PPJr was sick the first 2 of those days, so you can imagine how full my hands were!!     I literally had my hands, and arms full of sick babies.      Oh, excuse me.     I’ve just been informed by PP that “I not a baby!”

So, for 2 days, we 3 sat in the recliner, gently rocking, sometimes snoozing.     When I started to doze off, I would be rudely jerked awake, by a scream, or by crying.            

Or both.      Any of which is preferable to an elbow in the eye!!

 

No visual, since neither baby would take a selfie, and I had no hands free!

 

So, I Googled “grandmother rocking 2 babies”

and this came up.

slob, humor, crazy Google result

What in the world does this have to do with grandma rocking 2 babies???

Sometimes I wonder if Google has a mental disorder!

This is the very best Google had to offer:

slob, humor, grandma, 2 babies

Well, it’s a grandma all right! AND 2 babies!! I guess 2 outta 3 is the best we’re gonna get.

Remember when I had so much trouble with Google, and the spaghetti sauce??

How else can I ask for a grandmother rocking 2 babies???      

Ask for 3 dark haired men, 2 with beards??  Cuz apparently, they are related.

 

And here it is Tue evening,  I’m typing this with 1 hand, cuz the other is full of cranky baby.  I know some of y’all out there are familiar with this writing style!     The other baby, who declared “I not sick!!” then promptly fell asleep, is laid out on my bed.

At least when DD1 gets finished cooking supper, we can eat in peace an quiet!!

And now I have a post for Wed,      Please forgive the lack of one today.       Nurses don’t have much time to write!

 

Pudding Popping

Pop goes the weasel all night.     PP just can’t won’t stay put.      And no, I can’t play whack -a -mole, slob, humor, whack!  in aid of her sleep readiness!      However, I am starting to wish someone would just whack me with a hammer, so I could go out like a light!!slob, humor, please whack me on head!

 

 

 

(Another post I started almost a year ago, right after she started wearing undies, instead of pull ups to bed.    I’m trying to clear my backlog of stale posts!!)

I love my PP!!

 

But…….. I’m so tired!!     (Can you hear the whine???)        

WHY won’t she just.Go.To.Sleep!!

Finally!!!

And THEN!!!

Midnight swim, where was lifeguard??

Soaking wet bed, icy cold, clamminess!

slob, humor, Oh no!

Feex.com

She was as shocked, and surprised as I was!!

Baths, change sheets, snooze fest commences.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

 

Seven Seconds Shade

Y’all, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!     And this time I know fer sure, it’s not a train!       I’ve been de-cluttering, and purging the house for  …   how many months now???        And after almost 13 hours, I’m still not done!!

So, anyways, today we’ve got it made it in the shade, porch shade, that is.

Seven Seconds

Second Seven Seconds

Second Seven Seconds Sequel  

Seven Seconds Scullery 

Seven Seconds Scullery Spices

Seven Seconds Scullery Scape

Seven Seconds Scullery Sunder

Seven Seconds Scullery

Seven Seconds Scullery Spices

Seven Seconds Scullery Scape

Seven Seconds Scullery Sunder

Seven Seconds Scullery Scrape

Seven Seconds Scullery Scaffolding

Seven Seconds Scullery Second Scraping

SS Scullery Scrapings, Scobblelotcher

Seven Seconds Sisters’ Scene

Seven Seconds Scullery Skippy

Seven Seconds Shed

Seven Seconds Shed Seconds

Seven Seconds Sinking

Seven Seconds Second Sinking

Seven Seconds Shade- today’s shady deal

My porch hasn’t been touched in, oh a year or so??     For PP’s last birthday, July!!  PopPop cleaned it up, to put up her castle.  

(Insert castle pic here.)

Just in case I forget to take a pic of her own castle, here’s one very nearly like it.

slob, humor, not PP's own castle

Just like PP’s.     Except, it’s not hers.

BUT!!    He didn’t get rid of anything!    He just rearranged it.       (I don’t want to call him a hoarder, or anything……   but he still has every piece of Tupperware his mother ever touched.     And  lots more stuff, that we will just pretend doesn’t exist.      This is my tell-all blog, not his spill-my-guts-involuntarily-for-me-why-don’t-you-Melinda expose!!    So, nuff said.)

SO, here’s the hideous situation to begin:

AAAARRRGGGHH!!     I went to plug my phone in, to upload the pix, and the camo colored cord is missing!!      Complete and utter panic!!!!!        What do I do now?????

Ok, ok, calm down!       NOW!!      Breathe……

(Text DD1 in a panic, since she’s the only other one who uses this computer.       SF uses his TV, as a monitor, in the living room.)        Whew!!      It’s in Vanronica, which is right outside.        Alright, I can un-panic now!


Short station break while I huff and puff my way outside, and back.         Talk amongst yourselves.       Or have an ice cream bar!

Here we go.      Gratuitous selfie of said missing cord.        Such a happy, smiling cord!

slob, humor, camera cord

Smile! You’re on Camo Cord!

Now, we can finally begin the post!!   (382 words in….)

As I was saying…. SO, here’s the hideous situation to begin:   

slob, humor, porch clutter

Shady stuff

Ok, I think you’ve got a good idea now, of the titanic job we were facing.     Didja notice the sand on the floor?      PP is a true Floridian, and wants her toes in be in the sand, at ALL times!       This was AFTER I’d already given away the white stand, and sewing machine in it!

One of the 2 black chairs was broken, so I asked XH to throw it away.    He asked which one, so I told him “Sit on it!”      Then he was able to figure it out.       😉

A mountain of pillow stuffing/fake snow for Christmas villages rained down into trash bags.       The baby walker went rolling right into Vanronica, followed by so much stuff, I can’t even name it all!!

Here’s the Salvation Army haul for this time:

Yay!     More donations!!

XH, DD1, and I worked for an hour and a half!       3 x 1.5 = 4.5 (wo)man hours.     Wow!!   After XH swept, it looked gorgeous!!       

slob, humor, XH cleans up nicely

Sweep it clean!

 We all stood there dumbstruck that the porch was this big!   We were so used to seeing it piled high with junk, we forgot how nice it really is!

So nice and clean!       And suddenly spacious even!!

Previous Time: 12 hr 58 min

Plus Today’s 4 hr 30 min

Equals :   The envelope please!!     17 hr 28 min

Holy Cow!  I knew 7 was Waaaaay too little, but 17??   Really??

And still more bathroom, 1 bedroom, and the workshop to go!!

I hope I get it all done before I move again!      (Oops!    Let the cat outta the bag!!    Moving posts to come soon!)

 

Accomplished, Actually

I feel such a sense of accomplishment today!!   I was about to say “It’s not even noon yet, and already I’ve.”    Then I made the mistake of glancing at the clock.   It’s 12:49 pm.   But,  I decided that my sense of accomplishment is not dictated by the minute hand on the clock.

I have accomplished a lot already today!!   I woke up!!   In a good mood!   Feeling rested!! Read my Bible!

 

purple Holy Bible

From DH

Ate a healthy breakfast of oatmeal!  

slob, humor, empty bowl

Why would I show you an empty bowl??      Cuz I told ya, I ate it already!

{Guess I should dispense with the exclamations marks now!   Oops, sorry, last one, okay?}   Wrote in my diary.   Washed the dishes, ALL of them.   Found my stamps,

slob, humor, stamps

after just texting someone to borrow 3.   Picked up the 3 baby bibs outta the floor, that had fallen off the shelf, and put in a bag to donate.   (PPJr couldn’t even wear new born stuff the day she was born.   Who decides how big a baby’s neck should be anyway???)  

Cleaned off the side kitchen counter [-ish].   I put away the gaggle of plastic bags there, and removed the 2 shopping bags, and hung them on the dining room chair.

slob, humor, shop bags

 

 

 

 

 

What?? For now, that’s where they go, since they don’t have an assigned home yet.  

Drank 2 glasses of water, refilled the pitcher,

answered all my emails.  Commented on the 3 blogs that popped up.   Talked to my Mama, and DD1.   Ate 3 ice cream bars.   Well, that one right there probably shouldn’t count as an accomplishment…

 

Seven Seconds Shed

Here we go again!!

Seven Seconds

Second Seven Seconds

Second Seven Seconds Sequel

Seven Seconds Scullery

Seven Seconds Scullery Spices

Seven Seconds Scullery Scape

Seven Seconds Scullery Sunder

Seven Seconds Scullery Scrape

Seven Seconds Scullery Scaffolding

Seven Seconds Scullery Second Scraping

SS Scullery Scrapings, Scobblelotcher

Seven Seconds Sisters’ Scene

Seven Seconds Scullery Skippy

Seven Seconds Shed- today’s story.

 

Now I’m skipping on to Day six- Garage.      Well, in my case, shed, since I have no garage! I know, I just skipped to Day Four, with Sisters’ Scene, now here I am skipping to 6.         What in the world??        Do I have no sense of mathematical linear time lines??        Nope!       Well, yes I do, have a sense of them.        Just choosing not to apply them!

When I cleaned out the girls’ bedroom, I had to have some place to put all the stuff!!     (So actually I did this day first, but I didn’t want to totally blow your minds by skipping too many days at once!!)

 

slob, humor, old recycling

Why did she save these recyclables??    Can you guess where they went???

The shed, dun, dun, DUN!!  Quite a mess!

I’ve been here 15 months, and only ventured out there twice.     

This is all my own mess.       Well, no, not really.        I found 2 more boxes that had been left by the previous owner!!        DD1 said “Trash ’em!!     Obviously she doesn’t really miss ’em!”         So, I did!      Much to my own surprise!       It wasn’t even MY stuff, and I still felt anxiety just dumping it into the trash, just higgledy-piggledy!        Then the box of recyclables, that she was saving for……?????

And the purple shopping cart, and orange wagon were pulled out, and immediately put into play!  (First top pic.)

The bag of cement, that is hard as a rock, is waiting for stronger arms than ours to remove it!!

The brown, wooden, slatted box in the bottom, left pic, middle shelf, is an egg box, DD1 said, after looking in it.     She was just gonna recycle it, but I said “Wait!!”      We can sell that!!”    (Yeah, I should probably just go back, and put it out by the road, huh??)

Ahhhh!!        So much better!!       Not perfect, just better.

Not done yet tho!!      Still plenty of mess to declutter!

 

Shed time: 1 hr and 15 min. each, for 2 people: 2 hr and 30 min.

Total house time before: 7 hr 58 min.

Total House Time After Today: 10 hrs and 28 min.

 

Any guess as to the total time when I finally finish??