Timed Tidy Two

Okay, so I started with Timed Tidy.     And I told you the rest of the story would come later.    So, here it is: part two.

I started at 12:59 pm, Saturday afternoon.   I washed a drainer full of dishes.

clean dishes drainer humor

Ta-da!

 

(Well, okay, not exactly a drainer full of dishes……)

 

 

 Cleaned out some containers for recycling.   Took a potty break (hey, I’ve had 2 kids, if you’re a mother, ya know what I’m talking about, amiright??)    De-cluttered the counter top, by dumping out some nasty drink, from the Valentine’s party.  

moldy drink humor

EEWW!! Care for a beverage, anyone?? No?

 

 

 Put away stuff where it belongs.    Yes, some stuff DOES actually have homes!   Shock, shock!

 

It only took me 23 minutes, including taking the pix.    Now, really, 23 minutes is not long.    So why does it take you so long to do it, huh, PurpleSlob????

Oh yeah! And I cleaned the stove too!     Okay, Okay, I wiped the stove TOP.    Confession is good for the soul.

But, you guessed it, I’m still not done!    So, look for Third Timed Tidy any day now.    Just please, don’t hold your breath!!

Eggy Eggs

So, PP wanted eggs for lunch.    PP always wants eggs for lunch, for dinner, for breakfast…. basically anytime it’s food time!    Eggy, eggy, eggs.

And, since I’m such an awesome Omie, I let her crack the eggs one time.    Then, if you have kids, you know what happened.    She has to crack the eggs EVERY time now!    What was I thinking???    So, here we were after church, making scrambled eggs.    And she “stirs” them with the purple spatula, which doesn’t work, of course, because she basically just chases the yolks around and around the bowl.

 

purple pancake turner

WE always called it a pancake turner. Why did I say spatula??

 

So, next thing I know, she’s “stirring” them with her hands!    Wha????    Oh well, we washed her hands before, and we’ll bless the food before we eat it, so just grin and bear it.

Sometimes it’s hard to choke down the shells, but she tries!    (I try to distract her long enough to get the huge pieces out, but….)

Then she “helps” me pour them into the frying pan.    And I use “helps” really, really loosely.    I put the pan on the back burner, and she stirs the eggs until she gets bored, 5.6 seconds, or so, then she moves her stool to the sink to wash her hands.    And treat them to a full 15 minute spa experience, if I’ll let her!

pretty purple frying pan

It’s so purdy!!

 

Then, this time, the alarm went off!  

fire alarm

ANNOYING ALARM!!

 

I just ignored it, because it meant the eggs were ready!  But it scared PP, poor baby.   Happily, the eggs were done enough, and I turned off the stove, and the hideous clamoring ceased.   {Later, when I went to clean up, I saw the problem, in her enthusiasm, PP had slopped the eggs all over the burner.   Boy, if that wasn’t a joy to try to scrub up!}

Anyway, we said our blessing, and she inhaled the eggs.   And I thought I ate fast!    That girl loves her eggs!!    And she eats 3 every time!    So, of course I have to eat three, to keep up with her.   So, that’s half a dozen eggs, just for the two of us!!    And eggs are expensive, so it costs me…  calculating….  a whole dollar every meal!    Well, when you put it like that, it’s the cheapest meal ever!    50 cents each!

So, we were both full, we had a bonding experience, and the alarm was silent.    A successful end to our adventure!

Awful Alarm

See why I don’t cook???   All l did was turn on the oven,

oven set to 400 degrees

Oven on, temp. set

 

 

and put chicken thighs inside.  

half baked chicken thighs

Sorta baked thighs

Then the ear-splitting fire alarm goes off!  

fire alarm

ANNOYING ALARM!!

 

 I took it down, and put it inside my robe.

alarm in my robe

Looks like I’m alarmed and dangerous!

 

Then the one way down the hall joins in the cacophony.    Dang!    (I know I’m a big girl!!!, but still there ain’t room for both! )

 

So, I wrapped them both up in my thick blankie.   This oughta fix ’em!!

alarms inside blanket

Wrapped up like pigs in a blanket

If the smoke gets so thick they go off again, I better hi-tail it outta here myself!!

 

Even the alarms get alarmed when I try to cook.   It just ain’t worth the headache!!  That’s why I bake my potatoes in the microwave.   Looks like I need to learn how to bake chicken in there as well!!    Alternately, just buy canned chicken, and forget the whole “But, I want it hot!” thing.   I’m thinking that just might be the best solution.

It’s annoying, depressing, not a good thing at all.   Maybe part of my planning for meals should be donning my Haz mat suit???   AND calling the Firemen to be on stand-by???

Even with all the alarms, noise, and smoke, it turned out to be a yummy supper after all!

baked chicken baked potato

Baked , okay, microwaved potato, and baked (yes, really!) chicken

the “c” word

Yes I did the “C” word. It’s so awful I don’t even want to tell you what it is.

Oh ok. Cook. Happy now?

I was hungry. No more cereal or instant oatmeal. No frozen waffles etc. What was I to do?  I had to make a decision to get over myself, my laziness, and be a grown up.  It was agony.

How stupid would it be if Brother or Sweet friend came over, and found me dead from starvation, 3 feet away from a kitchen full of food??  Even if it WAS raw food that needed to be cooked??

So… here’s proof:

20150418_130944

20150418_13503420150418_135025The pictures cannot lie.  I cooked, in real life!

Good thing I’m into all this homemaking stuff.

I knew where everything was!  AND how to turn on the stove!  And I didn’t set off the fire alarm!!

(I was barefoot, and in the kitchen, but….. haha, you won’t catch me the 3rd thing!!)

All in all, I call it a success.

Great Grapes

Time to show off my finally decorated kitchen.  (Thank you, sweet friend!)

The grape cluster above my breakfast bar.

20150311_151638

The arrangement above my cabinets, over my stove.

20150311_151615

 

Each grape element:

20150311_15162320150311_151629

 

 

 

 

 

Over my pantry,

20150311_151609

Above the air return,

20150311_151541

Above my entryway, (but you can only see it as you are leaving)

20150311_151547

 

On my entry wall, as you come in.

20150311_151556

Great grape Cookie jar, on top of the fridge:

20150318_131238

 

The magnets on the fridge:

20150311_151719

 

 

(I know it’s a little bit egotistical to have a photo of myself on my own fridge, but, hey, if I don’t love myself, who will?)  I cross stitched the pansy one, way back in the day.

 

Don’t I have a pretty kitchen?  Notice I didn’t show you the counters or anything. WE ain’t going there today!  Just enjoy looking at the grape pretties!

Wish I had purple pots! and a purple microwave, and coffee pot, and toaster, and dish drainer, and knives, and cabinets, and floor, and stove, and refridge!  Well, I do wish it! I know it would be too much for you, but I’d adore it!  So, if you see any of these items, send them to me, pleeeaasse.

Questions

 

I’m sure you have questions for me.  Since I’m not a mind reader, I only play one on TV, I’m going to pretend I know what they are.

Why haven’t I posted any cleaning updates since Thursday?

Ummm, because I haven’t written any.

Why haven’t I written any you ask?

That would be cuz I haven’t cleaned since Wednesday. (hangs head in shame)

Oh, wait! That isn’t entirely true!  Friday morning I wiped the Thursday’s spaghetti sauce off the stove.  The baked on UFO,

(unidentified funky other-glob)  Not so much.  That part IS entirely true.

And I bathed Pudding Pop. Hey, that’s cleaning!!

I even took a shower!! Again with the cleaning.  And just now I turned on the dishwasher.  So there.

Okay, next question:

Do I think I’m funny?  Well, I’ve been told I am. (looks down demurely while blushing delicately)

And not just by my sister, either!!

Am I really a slob? OOOOHHH yes! If you need verification, I can provide witnesses. Again, not just my sister, either!

Am I purple?? Weeeell, I’ve had purple hair at different points in time. 

PurpleSlob with purple hair

PurpleSlob, purple hair

 

 

I wear purple nearly every day.  My living room curtains are purple, as are my reading glasses, and my purse.  I even have purple towels!  Not convinced yet?  Well, I can tell you I’ve had purple marker all over my hands before, and it’s not a good look for me! But sadly, my 1 (teeny, tiny, itsy, bitsy) tattoo isn’t purple. It’s a strawberry.  The bunch of grapes was WAY too big!!  And I’m a big chicken!  Plus, I’m from Plant City, FL.  The Winter Strawberry Capitol of the World, sooo it all came together.   Why I have a tattoo in the first place is a story for another day.

strawberry

Next!

Did I write all my comments myself under nom de plumes?  Absolutely!  After all, who better than me to know what I want to hear.  JUST KIDDING! Relax, it’s not a college paper, sheesh

Do I call my grand baby Pudding Pop IRL? (in real life)

Only when she’s in trouble. HA! When she’s in trouble her name really is “NO NO NO NO!”  And she knows it well!

How do I come up with the ideas for the posts?  Glad you asked.  My head is 1 giant squirrels’ nest, full of nuts.  Sometimes, I go chasing around and around in there, and something falls out.  Voila, a post idea!

Callosciurus_finlaysonii_-_Finlayson's_squirrel_(variable_squirrel)

By Rushenb – Own work, CC BY-SA 3.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=33630799

 

 

 

How do I have time to do all this writing, when I don’t have time to clean???

Sorry, folks!  Time’s up.  Come back soon, ya hear?