Cleaning Clone

Our living room window unit was faltering.        The orange warning “check filter” light came on.     So I asked Sweet Friend to fix it for me us, which he did very cheerfully.

But then I noticed that the outside of the vents were still very dirty.       So, I grabbed a wipee, and started wiping.        

Then I hear “I wanna help!”          Well, never turn down a child who wants to help clean!!

So, I handed PP another wipee, showed her what to do, and sat back, watching her go at it!!

I sent a pic of PP cleaning the a/c vents to the family, which showed her face, with the comment that I was teaching her to clean.

Sis in love, Shirley, said “I’m still struggling to get past the “teaching to clean” comment. I don’t know whether to laugh, or write something slightly sarcastic.       Well, I guess I did both.”     😉

Hey, Sis, I’m in Slob Recovery here!!      The best way to make sure you’ve really learned something is to teach others!!         Bonus:  I didn’t have to work anymore!!       Win-win!

Now that unit works like a dream again.

Great job, PP my love!!

slob, humor, little love

My purple little love!!

Sweeter Sweatin’

The 8 house series:

House’s Home

Wandering Wonderings

De-Clutter, De-claim, De-cline

De-clutter, De-claim, De-cline, De-clusion

Eight Eighths

Sweeter Sweatin’

This is the second hand account of the second time, working in my sweatshop widdle woom.       Where the sweatin’ is always sweeter, when it directly benefits me!!

Now, if I can only cast my mind back, to remember what I did!          (More than 2 weeks have passed, and I’ve worked on other things.      Why don’t I write things in the order I do them???     Because that would be too logical??)

Before Pic, for this go round.

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Filing cabinet fiasco.

As Dana, (Nony), says, some clutter is “Procrasticlutter”, delayed decisions.    The 2 black boxes, and the 2 cardboard boxes would be the illustration beside that word, in her dictionary!

The cardboard boxes are full of Verizon equipment, that I’ve been meaning to return.  Since before I left XH.      4 years ago, on July 1st.        So yeah, procrastination, at which I am a pro!        

But, I can’t just get rid of it!      I have to return it!!       Cause they already put it into collections, and its on my credit report, and everything!!        But, its been 4 years, and you haven’t done it yet.        But, I’m gonna!!         Are ya really??           Cuz I call bull hockey!

DD1 put it into perspective for me.        “Mama, you already have the ding on your credit.       Verizon has already written it off.       They don’t want back 5 year old equipment.        Dump it already!”

So I did.        Finally freedom!!      No more nagging sense of “Gotta do it”!!          Whew!   Really did give me some mental relief!!

slob, humor, more to trash!

Whittling it down to size!!

And the 2 black boxes???        They are Dish boxes, from the former owner, of my former trailer.        Yeah, I moved 2 heavy pieces of electronic clutter, that weren’t even mine.

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What in the world??

Yep, so I trashed ’em without a single qualm!     Along with the sparkly purple (broken) gift bag, squooshed behind there.

So much empty space!!       Nice!!       Now to take care of the other piddlin junks up there.

The de-tangler spray and bristly brush went on top of the girls’ dresser, within easy reach of PP, for after her bath.      Returned the little white drawers to DD1’s custody.      And so on, and so on.

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Ahhhh! Clean, empty space! So much easier to breathe! But, it does look kinda bare…

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                                    That looks better!!

 

But, I think it still needs something…..

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Aha!    That’s it!!      Perfect!

The glass jar was a birthday gift, from Cindy D.       Hey girl, hey!!

It look so gorgeous now!!      I stare at it, just to enjoy a purdy piece of calm!!

But, it takes vigilance to maintain the clean look!     I want it to stay pretty, and I’m the only one who lives in this room, and yet I’m constantly having to declutter the same little spot!      What’s up with that??        But the effort required to keep it clutter free, is so worthwhile!!

Now, if I only I could do something about this….

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This makes me blue!!

I asked Sweet Friend to just cut it off.      He refused.       The nerve!        He said “I don’t know where it goes, and you’re just renting this house, in case you forgot.”

Oh, that makes a difference???         Who knew!  

Maybe I can paint it white????          Try to shove it all the way back up thru the hole in the ceiling??         Cut it off myself???          Try to ignore it???

Sigh.         There’s always something.

Anyway, the sweatin’ was all the sweeter, for the sense of serenity, and the piece of prettiness, that I ended up with.  


I love my daughter!!          As I was finishing writing this, she came in, and I complained about her daddy not removing it.         She promptly climbed up on a stool, and….

slob, humor, cord almost gone.

Voila!! Cord be gone!! (Almost)

Blue bugger banished!!

Melinda’s Mothers Morning

Mother’s Day, May 14, 2017          

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Happy Mother’s Day, Melinda!

It was a wonderful day!!    OR “wunnerful”, as Laurence Welk used to say!!      (Google him, millennials; a famous band leader, had a TV show).

Went to church with DD1.     DD2 called.    I had a Steak-n-Shake Garlic burger, fries, {What GF diet??} and a purple milkshake.    

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Only the best purple shake in the world!!

 [Thank you Sweet Friend, for giving me the gift card!]     

 

 

 

 

 

 

Talked to my Mama; Sis, Brother, and Shirley texted me.

Went to new house, and had a Nap!!      Very important part of any great day!!

When I got up, unpacked 4 boxes.     Purged a small Walmart bag of new stuff from crafts, and threw away a half way full, small moving box of old legal papers.       They were from getting my disability in 2012.     But first I tore off all my names, addresses, and Social numbers!!     I shredded the tiny pile of that stuff, by hand even!!

By that time I was starving, well no, not literally!!      So DD1 got us each small pizzas.     She likes pepperoni, yuck!!      I only want cheese.    

slob, humor, cheese only pizza      Or, hamburg, and onions, if we’re getting fancy!!

Then, Sweet Friend came over, and asked where the screws were to put together the beige leather recliner.     How would I know??     I didn’t take it apart!!        And the take-apart-ee, never mentioned it to me.      But, DD1 and I had already decided we didn’t want it, due to its poor condition, and lack of space for it in living room.    

messy, messy recliner

                                                                    (Old pic)

So, when he said “Well, I can’t put it back together without the screws!      And then you can’t sit on it!”    We both looked at each other, with smiles on our faces, and said in unison, “Put it outside, by the road!”      He was flabbergasted!       We couldn’t really mean that!                 Yup, we did.           I said “Watch!    Somebody will take it!”         (I’ll be watching to see if that’s true.     But even if they don’t, trash pick up is in the morning, so 1 way or another, it will be gone!!     And I don’t care which way either!)

So, my first purge, at the new place has already occurred!       And I couldn’t be happier!!

Finally, to finish out my perfect day, I got kisses, and hugs,

slob, humor, hugs and kisses

Pinterest.com

 

 

 

 

 

from the girls when they came back from their dad’s!!

Nothing could be sweeter!

Van Vacuum

Vanronica was a “mommy van”.  

slob, humor, family

Sis’ family, before Jeffery died, and Ranger had to be re-homed.

 

If you have kids, or know someone with kids, ya know what I mean!

So, now it’s an Omie van, and I wanted it to start out clean, anyway!   Pretty soon, it’ll be back to “mommy van” status, I’m sure!   When the grands are “hun-gy”, ya gotta feed them!   Preferably cookies!   And chocolate!   {PP knows where her treat drawer is, in the house, trust me!}   All she has to do is bat those big, blue eyes, and Omie melts into a puddle.   “Here darlin’, have whatever you want!”

So, here is a few befores:

I spread the baking soda just to freshen up things.    (But it ended up making more work for myself Sweet Friend!)

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Whose idea was it to sprinkle baking soda again??

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Just needs a bit o’ vacuuming!

And a few afters:

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Still see the traces of baking soda, huh? I told you it made more work!

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AAhhh!! So nice and clean!

 

(Thank you so much, Sweet Friend for doing the actual vacuuming part!!   Hey, I spread out the baking soda, don’t forget!   I did my part!)  

There!   Nice and tidy- until the first time PP rides in it!!   I’m gonna try to train her to throw trash in a bag….  but, I’m not real hopeful.   She already had been “floor trained” in Burgundy.   She saw me throw stuff in the floor, so she did too.   But then she never saw me picking it up, when I should have been letting her help me clean!

We’ll see how it goes….

Van Vetting

The van didn’t really need vetting, but that’s a good alliterative title!

slob, humor, vehicle

Chrysler Town and Country. Nice! Stow and Go- luxury model even! I’ve moved up in the world!

 

It was Sis’ van, so I knew it was in good working condition.   She had even just bought brand new tires in January!   Woo hoo!   And, she had a oil change plan, that had 2 free oil changes left on it!   Double woo hoo!!

But then, when I took it in, they discovered a HUGE problem!

A tail light bulb was out!!   What would I ever do??   If I drove down the road like that, no one would see me stop!   They’d crash into me and I’d die!!

And it cost SO much money!!   They wanted a whole SEVEN dollars!!   Yes, I said SEVEN!!   Highway robbery, almost!   

Instead, Sweet friend fixed it for free!   Cuz super Sis already had the bulb in the van, waiting!   Triple woo hoo!!

slob, humor, vehicle

Lookit at the love Sis left me! (Look at the steering wheel.)

slob, humor, vehicle

All the back seats fold into the floor. So cool!

See how handy??   There’s even room to carry a washing machine back there!!   True story!

Okay, I think I’ve convinced you that I got a FABULOUS deal from my generous Sister.   It was more than generous!   (What’s the next level up from generous??)

Pssst   remember that google thesaurus thing we talked about??   This would be the time to use it again.

 

Magnanimous!   That’s it!   My magnanimous Sister!!   Thank you again, a million times, Sis!!   I love you!   And not just cuz of the van, either!

slob, humor, heart

LOVE!

Okay. Down to the business of naming the van.

Wow, I’m already at 277 words!  That went quick!   Can y’all hang in there with me, for a little bit??   Or ya want me to split up this post??

I can’t hear you!!

So, with there being no “nay” votes, onward we go!

Mama suggested “Silver” as a name.   But I already explained why that’s a no.

Then Gary jumped into the fray.  His quick mind came up with all kinds of suggestions!

“Vanity” from “Verity” was a good one.   So was “Vanonica” from “Veronica”.    I just took that 1 step further, and ta da!   

Her name is now, and forever more shall be “Her Royal Majesty the Queen of all Vans,  Vanronica”

Vanronica for short.

Thanks Gary for all your help!!

 

 

 

Rose’s Reception

My ex-stepmother, Rose, invited me over for dinner.

(Yes, I know my family is weird.  We’re still friends.)

And to make it even weirder, she invited Sweet friend, and XH to play cards with us.   How’d ya like them apples??

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Guest

 

closet under deconstruction

Master carpenter at work! Closet under deconstruction.

 

(Again, yes I know my family is weird.   The weirdest things were #1  When my Mama was living with me and XH, we invited Rose to live with us, because a hurricane had made her homeless.   They had made friends by then, because Rose was divorced from Dad by that time too.    They called each other ex-wives-in-law!!   And if you think THAT was weird, wait till you hear THIS one!   #2  When Sweet Friend needed a place to stay when he retired from the Navy, XH let HIM live with us!   (No, we weren’t running a hotel, even though you would have thought so!   Rose had already moved out by that point.)

XH was really sweet about letting family live with us, when they needed a home.

Okay, well, this post was supposed to be about dinner and cards at Rose’s.   I got WAY off track there!

Anyway, while Rose was cooking, I texted: “Do ya need any help cooking?”   She knew that was a trick question!

But I did go over early, and set the table.   I helped!

Steak, baked potatoes, (in the microwave because she couldn’t start the gas oven, see? I’m not the only one!), and chicken on the grill.  YUMM!!

Then we played cards.   And I won!  That doesn’t happen very often!!

All in all, a terrific night.

Porch Pose

PP and I came home, and tried to get in.    Couldn’t.    Porch door lock was cranky.    So, I jiggled it a little, which usually works.     Nope!

The lock  pieces fell out into my hand.   Shock!!

humor, lock falls out

Yep, something just like that!!

 

PP began screaming, crying,

humor, screaming toddler

Yep, looks just like PP in full voice!

 

and banging on the door like she was locked out of an ice cream store.

I tried pulling on the door.   Nope, no go.     Sat down on the conveniently-left-outside-the-porch chair,

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(This is obviously inside.    But it’s the same chair.)

and began dialing.

Sweet Friend not answering.    What could you  possibly be doing that is so important, you can’t answer my distress call????

Finally in desperation, after 20 minutes of wailing, and crying, and oh yeah, PP doing it too, I called XH.

He came right away, thankfully, but couldn’t get the door open either.

Why??    Cuz, duh!   The lock was broke!!

So, he went thru the unlocked (Thank God) workshop.     Hey! why didn’t I do that??    I dunno, a screaming toddler???   No light???    Didn’t think of it???

He had to bang on the latch to get it open.     Relief!     Spelled “O-P-E-N D-O-O-R”.

Later Sweet Friend asked me where the pieces of the lock were.

I threw them in the  trash or recycling.   I dunno.

“Why would you do that?   Why didn’t you  keep them?” he queried.

Oh, I dunno, an upset, screaming toddler throwing herself at door??   Because they were broken???   Because I didn’t realize there was gonna be an autopsy??

Anyway, Sweet Friend took off the latch part, so we wouldn’t get stuck again.    Thank you, SF!!

Then, that weekend, he installed a spanking new lock!!      What would I do without my SF???     (Besides never being able to latch my porch door ever again, I mean!)

 

Totally Tanked

I’m about to totally lose it!   Toilet troubles, again!!!  How many times is that, since I moved in in June???  600!!  Give or take….

It’s a catastrophe, that’s making me cranky, and crazy!!  CRAY-CRAY, I tell you!!!

 

This is Tuesday night, and the chain slipped off again, Monday night.  DH came over this morning and “Fixed ” it.  By after lunch, it wouldn’t flush again!  Is he “fixing” it with a wad of gum????

He said I was flushing “Too Hard”.   Wow, I didn’t realize the power I was unleashing in my mighty index finger!!

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Re-enactment: at sweet friend’s house.  Somehow my originals from this morning didn’t make it thru the wormhole.

 So, I’ve promised to only push with my poor, pitiful, powerless pinky.  Hopefully problem solved!  (I doubt it, but we’ll see……)

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Here’s a sad pic of the offending machinism:

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This is my real toilet, this time.  What do you mean, “EWWWW”???

Who cleans their toilet tank??  You mean, that’s a thing?  You’re supposed to??  Oops!  I didn’t get the memo!

I’m just so sick of the drama.   Seriously considering installing an outhouse, sans corn cobs!   Off to check the park regulations on that…..

 

Speaking of #2

The First Part of the Story.

(Sorry, just couldn’t help myself, with that title!!)

The Dr. told me I had:

Kidney disease.

Gray1123

What??  I’d never had any kidney problems before….  Well, except the UTI  2 weeks ago.

Realization dawned on me, as I sat there in shock, crying.  I’m dying!!  Like, immediately!!

If your kidneys crap out, it’s dialysis then death!  A really grim picture!

Bismarck_auf_dem_Totenbett

Visions of my quickly approaching death ran thru my mind.  Then, being me, I started to plan my funeral.  Would everybody wear purple, like I want them to???

I went out to the car, hobbling on my walker, and called Mama, still justa bawling.

Mama! I’m dying! Like right now!”

Of course, she was shocked, and tried to get down to the bottom of it.

Long story short, I made up my mind that I wanted to LIVE!!

And I knew that involved some BIG, and serious changes.  So, I decided to change.

Sweet friend had a Wheat Belly Cookbook.

(Don’t ask me why, he doesn’t eat Gluten-free.  But he usually has 1 of anything I ever say I need, packed away somewhere.  NO!!  He’s NOT a Hoarder!!  How dare you suggest that??  He’s just prepared!  😉  )

A life saver!

A life saver!

So, I read it, that night.

To Be Continued….

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